the world according to i

Roots...

2009-05-11T09:30:00.000-07:00

Every male on my dad's side of the family was bald before they turned 30. My hair is my only source of vanity and when i was younger, i was shit scared about the same bald fate (pate?) passing down the family tree. Having genes that did not do too well with respiratory viruses, overworked joints and a sense of humour, it could almost have been a certainty that another strand got mixed up with the wrong bunch and sent me down the same .... until i came to know that male pattern baldness is passed down from the mother's side.

My grandfather has a thick set of hair on his head, and he is well into his eighties. Sigh of relief....

... until a few days ago, when someone pointed out that there was possibly a bald patch developing in the center of my head. That couldn't be! All my mother's male relatives have a thick set of hair on their heads! Maybe a bad hairdo? Could be just a bad hair day, right?

WRONG. My mother has 5 sisters. Her mother had sisters as well. No matriarchal male relatives within three generations. Considering my knowledge about my relatives extends only to people who are within the boundaries of this city, there's technically no chance of me finding the closest male relative on my matriarchal side to determine whether the baldness strand has fallen from those genes.

Maybe i could simply look for this lost gene along with the lost family members on a trek through the wilderness of North Karnataka and Goa. It could be a nice documentary or a book. i'll call it Roots.

Learnings from a Jury...

2008-12-14T22:08:00.000-08:00

Censored for lack of appropriateness and presence of objective opinions.

Thesis Panel...

2008-11-30T05:30:00.000-08:00

for those who haven't seen and wanted to see it

...

2008-11-29T10:48:00.000-08:00

Amongst the entire institutional and administrative framework, the worst reaction to the incidents of the last few days was from, as expected, our politicians:
1 - Sonia Gandhi reads a speech off a teleprompter in her halting Hindi, doubly alienating her from anyone who should be listening. And she makes a speech before our Head of State, illustrating once and for all who holds the reins in this country.
2 - Manmohan Singh gives the most insipid speech i've heard given by any head of state. His speech defending his government during the vote of no confidence had more life in it. And this guy was supposed to be a politician with a difference.
3 - Shivraj Patil is as confused as ever, never knowing what is going on as he fidgets in his prim and proper safari suit. On Thursday, when reporters throng him for news on the arrested terrorist's interrogation, he begins a soliloquy on V.P. Singh. What will it take to fire him?
4 - L.K. Advani along with his smiling fascists turns up at Oberoi and makes veiled references to intelligence failure. The NSG fires at terrorists in the background and this guy stands within his Z+ security cordon mouthing off for a few votes.
5 - Narendra Modi says 'I told you so'. Apparently, the handling of this incident was worse than Godhra in 2002. Or maybe he's just forgotten it.
6 - R.R. Patil first says there are 2 terrorists loose in the city. Then retracts his statement. Then makes it again. This is the Home Minister of Maharashtra.
7 - Vilasrao Deshmukh looks to either his Chief Secretary or DGP for EVERY question at a press conference. How does one have the guts to come to such a sensitive press conference without being prepared?
8 - The saviour of the Marathi Manoos Raj Thackeray decides to overlook all north indian and south indian contributions in saving the city. Declares a bandh on Monday, when another form of terrorism has ensured we've had three days of bandh already.
9 - Milind Deora, for suggesting politicians visiting terror stricken areas do not impose any additional load on the police "since they come with their own security". Security drawn from the NSG corps. No wonder we do not have a battalion in every state as was the intention of founding this group.

There is a problem with the parliamentary system of democracy if i, as a citizen, cannot put any of these guys to task. i elect an MLA who may or may not help appoint a Chief Minister. If i feel the CM is not doing his job well, i fire the MLA who might have actually been good. Ditto for the MP and the Prime Minister. It gets worse for the corporator, who's only job is to make so much noise that the Municipal Commissioner is irritated enough to take action.

How can things change?

Cosmopolis...

2008-09-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

At 11.47 PM near my house, passed a Ganpati immersion procession sponsored by a Tulu speaking restaurateur, followed by a truck with some Bihari boys dancing to "Singh is King". Refreshments on the roadside provided in the memory of a Gujarati resident of the area, with the food supplied by a Muslim shop owner. The Sindhi residents of the opposite building line the roadside with flowers and rice to throw at the idol.

i am not making this up.

In rememberance...

2008-08-15T00:53:00.000-07:00

Today is Independence Day and all the channels on TV are full of gung-ho patriotism. Obviously, the fact that we just won a gold medal at the Olympics has added fuel to the jingoistic fire. Snapshots from the freedom movement rule the day and if i see another file picture of Nehru releasing doves or Gandhi on the Dandi March i will scream. Or of Kapil Dev holding aloft the Cricket World Cup or even Vajpayee giving the thumbs-up after conducting nuclear tests. All nice, fun times. Not a single bad memory in the public archive?

Agreed its a day to celebrate the survival of a nation for 61 years many considered doomed at birth. But living in a world where everyone has rose tinted glares seems to be a daily phenomenon here. Barely three weeks ago, 60 bombs were found in 3 different cities, 25 of which went off, killing a fairly large number of people. Last year, there were bomb blasts in Hyderabad. A year before that, blasts in Mumbai's trains. Six years ago, a communal conflagration whose effects are still seen in every act of politics in that state. A separatist movement in a state given a boost by a communal group's protests - encouraged by a political party with its eyes at the next election - is still raging on.

All of this has faded from public memory. Not a single reminder to any of these events exist. And there will be none for any other events that seem to distract us from the old fantasy of a happy, peaceful India with 'unity in diversity' (whatever that means) propagated through Doordarshan's 5 minute films.

There is not a single post-Independence memorial for soldiers. No mechanism for remembering the tsunami or the various bomb blasts that have plagued us in the last 15 years. No museum dares to put up an exhibit of a communal riot. These symbols of the memory of a shared tragedy are not mere lip service. They become the focus of a collective catharsis which concludes with a will to not let that event occur again. Maybe that's why the same security lapses and the same excuses from governments allow riots and bombs to take place again and again. Or the failure of the met department to predict a cyclone is forgiven time and time again. Or political parties are not ostracised for causing pain and loss to millions of people.

It seems even at the age of 61, India wants to live in an imagination of itself.

Reversal...

2008-08-03T07:05:00.000-07:00

Recently there was a small news item amongst all the excitement about the trust vote about women two wheeler riders in Pune. To protect themselves from heat and pollution, a lot of them cover their faces with scarves, which now the police find to be a security threat as one cannot determine the identity of the person with the scarf.

Oddly enough, there was also a woman from the NCW who must've felt she is in some surreal nightmare as she defended the right of the women to cover their heads and faces. A two wheeler rider also felt that if women can wear burkhas and ride bikes, then why can't she wear a scarf over her face. Even stranger was the normally ultra-conservative police force asking women to NOT cover their heads and faces.

This brought to mind a legislation in France a few years ago, which made the display of overt religious symbols an offence, where burkha clad women protested saying its their right to wear what they want to wear. And the modern, secular, gender-sensitive state cracks down on them. Orhan Pamuk's Snow speaks of a similar irony in secular Turkey where wearing the burkha, even out of choice and not out of compulsion, is seen as a sign of fundamentalism and chauvinism.

Secularism and modernity contradict themselves all the time. Yet, it's odd to see and hear things like these, when one more or less thinks the lines between two polarities have been clearly etched and the two sides very easily definable. So does one say that in one case, allowing women to cover their heads is okay and in another it's not?

Or does one simply wear a helmet on a two wheeler?

It's Finally Over!!! (or is it?...)

2008-08-03T00:41:00.000-07:00

The first 4 are of the living-dining room, the 5th one of the study table and the last one of the bedroom. i take horrible photos.

Patriotism...

2008-07-19T05:34:00.000-07:00

The legal length of the Indian national anthem is 52 seconds.

So the next time you wonder why your local movie theatre subjects you to a extra long rendition with AR Rahman flipping his hair or are forced to see a horrendous animation of the Indian flag, just remember that the theatre owner is making sure that no disrespect is shown towards the anthem. A anthem-like song going on for more than 52 seconds doesn't remain the anthem anymore, so it really doesn't matter if someone doesn't stand up. Naa rahega baans, naa bajegi baansuri.

Very patriotic. Maybe some of our political parties should N-gage in such silent show of patriotism, rather than the tamasha going on right now.

Under Construction...

2008-07-06T08:04:00.000-07:00

Stupid...

2008-06-23T08:53:00.000-07:00

Today, as he sways his cool arthritically bent hands to some heavy bass, AD declares with the air of a savant: "Indians are too stupid to understand rap music"
For a minute lets assume he didn't mean to be so blatantly stereotypical. What does one need to understand about rap music?
Is the highly misogynistic lyrics too difficult to figure out? Does it take a genius to figure out that Eminem is "singing" about killing his wife?
Is it the extreme fascination with sex coded into the lyrics not easy to understand? i mean, how obvious does 'I like big butts and I cannot lie' sound?

Don't get me wrong. i like certain rap artists, atleast the ones who have something useful to say. Like when Jay-Z makes '99 Problems', you know he's writing from the heart about being stereotyped. Or even some Dr. Dre and Coolio songs are really about what rap music set out to be: the voice for a minority community.

But what does one make out of 50 Cent and his glamourous tale of being shot 9 times and still living. Or Akon faking a prison term so he sounds cooler. Or Kanye West being made an outcast in the rap world just because he had middle class parents. Or the dumbification of people in an entire country and maybe even the world by people singing about 'Du-ing thaat thang' who can't even spell their names correctly. (Yung Joc? What grade did he dropout in?)

Does anyone else find extremely outsized clothes and pants that fall off on a single touch irritating? It was apparently started by some rap musicians from the Bronx who were so poor they couldn't afford to buy new clothes and mostly wore oversized hand-me-downs. So the attire became a part of their identity. But it looks really absurd to see a visibly well-to-do Bandra boy with pants that start at his knees and so loose that he's trying hard to hold it up. i wonder what will happen if someone tries to steal his "bling-blings". Will he run after the thief or stand back to protect his degraded sense of self?

Maybe what attracts people to rap music is the glamour factor of an adventurous life. For a white middle class guy or a bored spoilt townie, the life of a rap musician is exciting. A life marked by gang wars, drugs and loose women who want to drop their clothes at the snap of a finger.

So AD, i'm sorry i don't understand rap music. Maybe one day when i get into your position of protracted ennui, i would be a little more enlightened.
'If you're having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i got 99 problems but the bitch ain't one'

Notes from the underclass...

2008-03-15T07:34:00.000-07:00

i'm sure millions of Indians like me have felt it before.
That sickening feeling you get when you're about to put that morsel of chicken in your mouth. Just because your vegetarian friend feels you're doing something 'wrong'.
The frustration you feel when you realise that all the restaurants along Marine Drive do not serve non-veg because they're afraid local residents will burn their restaurants down.
The feeling of being an outcast when your landlord asks you to choose between cooking non-veg or leaving your apartment.
i think its time we accept that non-vegetarians are the new untouchables of this country. We've been barraged by religious zealots, health experts, celebrity dieters and housing societies all over the country. i have heard every excuse for justifying vegetarianism, every form of emotional blackmail and even threats to make me stop eating non-vegetarian food.
It all seems bearable. After all, its all done 'unofficially'. No one can actually force me to stop eating non-veg food. Maybe not yet...
There was a piece of news hidden under all the news about IPL, Tibet and Mayawati. A Jain group approached the Supreme Court to stop the slaughter of animals and sale of meat during some festival and (shockingly) the SC agreed! This time aggressive vegetarianism justified by saying, 'Only for nine days'.
Maybe its time to include a 'Right to Eat' in our constitution. But just like our 'Right to free speech', it'll have a rider attached to it: Eating chicken in vegetarian parts of the city will be considered an act of inciting violence. The offender will be remanded to 'protective police custody'.

Tomorrow's Headline...

2008-01-06T08:59:00.001-08:00

i feel sorry for the newspaper editors of this country today. Look at their options for tomorrow's headline...

'Andrew Symonds racially abused by Harbhajan Singh'
- Huh?!! What?!! A white man abused by a brown man??

'Match referee believes Michael Clarke, bans Harbhajan'
- Wow... that would be funny. Or maybe someone got reallllyyy drunk. Would you trust someone who doesn't walk when it's obvious he's out?

'Indian calls Australian a monkey'
- i think we need to call Sanath Jayasuriya to bear witness.

'Australians complain about sledging'
- Oh come on!

Maybe this would be appropriate:
'Race row in Australia: Brown man suffers'

CSI Theatre of Performing Arts...

2007-12-25T00:54:00.000-08:00

Waiting at the International Airport to pick people up is like watching hundreds of performances at one shot.

First of all, is the audience. Arranged in two tiers, the cheap 'seats' are outside the building and the 'balcony section' is inside, where you pay to enter. Already the audience is waiting for their rockstars with signs saying 'Mr. Adam Smith, Welcome to India' or 'Fertiliser industry welcomes delegates'. The excitement mounts as the flight information indicator changes frmo 'Scheduled' to 'Arrived' and reaches a crescendo when the Opening Act (read: the airline crew, who get first preference to leave) makes its appearance.

Then come the stars of the show. They are watched at every point along the looooong corridor that has bouncers standing along the edges. They have to make sure they meet the expectations of their waiting audience. The firangs have to look 'desified' enough, the desis have to look firang enough. Let's face it, who'll give bhaav to a desi without a pony or not dressed in a tracksuit?(that's funny, isn't it? Most of us leave in shirts and corduroys and return in banians and shorts. Is is THAT expensive?) Or for that matter, a firang without the mandatory tilak or Goa shirt?

The waiting audience is also performing. People who've spoken in Hindi or Marathi or Tamil or any of the hundreds of native tongues all their lives, suddenly acquire a new comfort with English when they enter the waiting lounge. And a twang to boot. But the air inside the waiting area is not firangified enought, so mentions of 'snakes and cheaps' slip through amongst the 'oh yeah the flight is naat on ske-dool'.

The show begins. Our country bumpkins turned rockstars acquire a new coolness to them. Compulsory mineral water bottle in hand, (after drinking our sludge for 25 years that too) they wear their sunglasses (at 3 in the morning) and emerge at the end of the exit corridor with their trolleys and waist pouches. The crowd goes into a frenzy. Camera phones click, ring tones start getting louder, conversations become hypersonic. And the waving! Oh who could forget those! The two carloads of people who've come to receive the rockstar start a mexican wave. (And why shouldn't they? What else could be the purpose of 15 people coming to receive one person) The rockstar responds with a wave thats strangely cold (Were they moonlighting as President Bush's waving body double?) and as he/she approaches the by-now-wild fans, he/she lets out a 'Hey wazzaa?' (Yes, your grandmother understands what you say. The universal language of showing attitude.) Then the point towards the exit, and all the groupies run off behind their rockstar.

But all is not hunky dory for our rockstars. Sometimes, they get stuck in customs and baggage loading. Or sometimes, CSI airport just messes with them. Just for fun. Really.

Thank God for CSI airport people. Without them, our rockstars would have had heads the size of watermelons!

Moving On...

2007-12-02T08:32:00.000-08:00

This Indo-Pak cricket series has been devoid of all the passions that usually accompany it. One could say, considering the frequency with which these teams play each other nowadays, it has become less and less of an entertainer. But Indo-Pak cricket has more than just cricket, hasn't it?
i think the rivalry was at its peak in the '80s when, ironically, both teams played each other as often as they do now. Sharjah was the battleground then, and anyone even remotely interested in the game knows about Javed Miandad's last ball six in 1986. The best team of the time was the West Indies, but no one seemed to care how we fared with them. As long as we beat Pakistan. Somehow the yardstick has changed and Australia is the team we have to beat, come what may. Some see the Pakistan series as a warm-up before the Australia tour! Have our focuses changed?
i think it's got to do with the fact that, as a nation, we aren't competing with Pakistan anymore. The world sees us as India, not as the 1st part of a hyphenation that linked us with Pakistan since 1947. We've left Pakistan behind in most economic indicators, and also most political ones. A battle on the cricket pitch in the 80's seemed almost allegorical to the battle for political and economic one-upmanship the two countries were involved in. Not so much anymore. If China played cricket (sorry... good cricket), the China tour of 2007 would have been the highlight of the cricket season. We've clearly moved on.

Bullshit...

2007-11-28T01:08:00.000-08:00

Gems from the mouth of Hafeez Contractor:

"I might have caviar, lobster, salads and a whole lot of things for dinner but if there is nothing to eat and my mother gives me some simple food, I would happilly devour it. I look at architecture from this approach. We have the skills to compete with Frank Gehry and Renzo Piano but would my client accept it?"

"I look at architecture from a survival point of view; as a service to the nation. so if we are doing some so-called bad buildings compared to the world scenario thats all right because we are making the whole nation survive."

Which means that making bad architecture is his service to the nation???? And since the accompanying article says he's the 'inspiration for the next generation of Indian architects', does it become my responsibility too??

Pedagogy...

2007-10-31T00:37:00.000-07:00

Mr. M was a nice man who taught us Hindi and Marathi in school. His passion for teaching reflected in the way he taught, every sentence and every word somehow acquiring a new meaning attached to it. We made fun of some of his habits, including his cycling all the way to school from his home, but i am sure others too had as much respect for such simple habits as i did. He was one of the few teachers who avoided being a caricature, by avoiding being too pedagogical or too friendly. For people like me who hated learning Marathi, he was someone we aspired to impress by working hard.
He was also in charge of the prefects and the Scouts in the school. One of of my friends who was a prefect and almost flunked in Marathi one time was told 'Don't bring ME to shame by flunking next time.' Most of us remember him along with this salute he taught us, to be performed during all flag hoisting ceremonies. It was derisively called the 'prefect salute' and made much fun of, but it was something that made us feel a part of a bunch.

This is not an obituary. Mr. M still teaches and inspires a new generation of kids in my school and will for atleast a few more years.

But to my surprise (and it wasn't a pleasant one) i saw the 'prefect salute' on TV last week. It was performed by old men in khaki shorts and the news reel showed other old men talking about their 'gallant' acts in disemboweling pregnant women and emasculating young Muslim men. i couldn't help but wonder if that's where the salute came from. And it shames me that Mr. M is in some way associated with these monsters. It shames me that a salute that made me feel proud at one point of time is equated with such acts of horror. It shames me to see perfectly peaceful and ordinary men and women reduced to acts of depravity.

i try to remember if there was some sign of Mr. M being in cohorts with these guys. i've tried remembering every chapter i've learnt with him, if there was some subliminal message of hatred in them. i've second guessed every word, every sentence i can remember coming from him.

The inspirational man with the Hitler moustache who rode a bicycle to school has been forgotten. The Hitler moustache is all that remains.

Rewind...

2007-10-25T01:08:00.000-07:00

The last couple of weeks have been in flashback. One because of a job interview that required me to make a portfolio in a couple of days, and a junk clearing session that somehow tempted me to look through everything i have written in the last 5 years.

Portfolios have this amazing tendency to make you hate yourself. All the projects i thought have gone well don't seem so good anymore. The ones that seem good, don't look good in their scans. The ones on the comp don't look good on an A3. There were some i tried formatting as fast as possible just because looking at bad drawings for longer than 15 minutes will cause my brain to self-destruct out of shame. (No, it hadn't happened already... look elsewhere for your wisecrack)

Sorting out the writing happened just as i was looking for a 2nd year humanities project. It's a good exercise reading what you wrote a few years ago, you can actually see the changes in every writing decision you made. i seem to have lost out the humour and gained a mean, sarcastic streak. It also seems to be taking itself very seriously (the result of blogging???). Some seem a lot more depressed than before.

i wonder how much of this is 'growth' or just simply the gradually increasing levels of comfort with blogging one seems to achieve after getting used to this medium. Somehow i don't feel the need to cloak my state of mind while writing anymore.
Wonder if this has passed onto design...

Jungle Fever...

2007-09-30T10:43:00.000-07:00

Discomfort...

2007-09-28T10:58:00.000-07:00

Every time after printing from Andheri, i am forced to encounter eunuchs at the Juhu lane signal. i guess everybody knows what happens in such situations. First they clap, then touch you, then give blessings and continue giving them unless you decide not to pay up, which means its time for the curses (which i am told should be avoided at all costs... bad luck apparently...). In effect they're just begging for money but what is interesting is how uncomfortable they make people. And more so for men, something about the sexual ambiguity that probably makes us uncomfortable. One cannot stare at them or compete with them either, so what does one do?

A friend of mine was accosted by a couple of eunuchs on a road. He actually panicked enough to actually hand over his wallet. Another yelled at the top of his voice (a damsel-in-distress type) when a eunuch touched his hand. A third actually claims to have been given 'darshan' and has been scarred for life. And there are many more horror stories that i am sure everyone can relate to. But in the end, they're just asking for your money. How difficult is it to just say no??

Anathema...

2007-08-19T06:25:00.000-07:00

First it was performed only on two days of the year. Then some jingoistic rabble rouser decided that 'youngsters aren't patriotic enough' and bullied theatre owners to play it before every movie. Now thanks to Airtel and AR Rahman, we hear a different rendition of the national anthem in every ad break. Yes, its nice to hear people as varied as Bhimsen Joshi and SP Balasubramaniam sing it, or to see the Mangeshkar sisters sing ('They look so happy when they sing together!!') again. But every 10 minutes? Isn't that a bit too much? Now that the anthem has become a part of pop culture sponsored by a corporate entity, how long before the flag becomes a part of someone's new designer line, or the national song is remixed by some DJ??

And how many times do i have to stand up for the anthem in a day to prove that i'm a patriotic Indian?

New Blog...

2007-07-19T04:00:00.000-07:00

It's up and running. That too only after 7 'ayes'. Hmph. And thank you NC. Although next time, the building should be a local one...

http://www.archlogblog.blogspot.com/

Extremes...

2007-07-12T10:06:00.000-07:00

This one might be boring. (Don't give me wisecracks, i know you are funny... you know who you are)

Two experiences in the last 2 days have left me with contrasting feelings. One is obviously great joy and satisfaction after what was one hell of a Make/Shift Mumbai exhibition. i really didn't care how many architects came, but what was really nice was more than half the visitors were (to use quite a derogatory word) lay-people. To see ordinary everyday Mumbaikars interested and concerned about the fate of their city and really trying to understand the efforts that have gone behind a lot of the work regarding the city fills me with hope: small sparks can make a difference.

On the other hand was a discussion on Orkut involving many of my classmates which was extremely disappointing, to put it mildly. More than 200 comments were posted whether Hafeez Contractor is a 'good' or 'bad' architect. In the 5th year of an architectural education, a lot of people wonder if we have any right to criticise anyone's work since 'we haven't built anything ourselves'. Another thing: Why does 'criticism' always involve only negative things? And the other seemingly consistent thread was 'if laypeople like Hafeez's elevations then what is wrong with everyone else doing the same thing?' Which means after 5 years of B.Arch and spending close to 3 lakh rupees of our parents money, we still feel our specialised education puts us on par with someone who has had no exposure to aesthetics or architecture. (i don't mean to sound elitist or egoistic but just putting down the facts) One could say only 4-5 people had such opinions and although AS gave a real fight against some of this stupidity, i don't think any opinions have changed.

At the same time, i think a lot of this intellectual garbage is spouted owing to the fact that the only role models amongst architects seem to be dead ones, dying ones, western-appreciated ones or rich ones. Architectural magazines don't even dare to criticize a building for fear of losing that architect's favour, as a result no one seems to appreciate truly decent work and a mere description of work, whether decent or not, suffices as architectural debate. And the fact that whether Hafeez is good or bad involved references to no building or architect other than Hafeez himself is deplorable.

Remedying this situation would take some gargantous effort but again owing to the first experience i feel a small effort can make some difference.

i propose starting a blog where everyone can send mails (something like a PostSecret) regarding any building they see in this city, whether good or bad not relevant. The mailer has to 'criticise' the building, and i mean understand the building not just point out its flaws. Maybe something like a Pros and Cons of that building. Honestly. And i will do my part and post all the mails i get, without bias. AND I MEAN ALL.

If i get 15 people or more to respond with an 'aye', i start the blog. Otherwise, you guys still have to face the ranting and raving with no result at the end of it.

In the beginning...

2007-06-18T09:49:00.000-07:00

Turns out some Muslim cleric declared a fatwa against a newspaper that showed Adam and Eve in the nude.

In light of this news, i offer the Genesis after Day 6.
On the seventh day, God teaches Adam and Eve to weave, cut and stitch cloth.
On the eight day, Adam and Eve discover polyester.
On the ninth day, Adam keeps some planks over some rocks. He calls it a 'ramp'.
On the tenth day, Adam turns up wearing a pink turtleneck, skin-fit jeans and a beret and tells Eve, 'We need to talk....'

Sentient Being...

2007-06-11T07:18:00.000-07:00

Today i had a conversation with the rickshaw wala about Oil Politics in the World.
It started quite innocuously with him asking why the rains were delayed this year. i figured he was curious enough to merit an explanation about the cyclone in Oman and how it was affecting our monsoon. Then he asks whether the oil production in Oman was affected. i said ya, but it'll be okay in a few weeks.

Few seconds later, "We get our petrol from Oman??" i said, maybe, we get it from all over the world.
"This Reliance-weliance found petrol in Rajasthan or something, no?" i said, ya, i think so.
"Then why we have to get it from outside?" Well, for one we can't produce enough and also the oil we get here is too expensive to convert to petrol.

The topic is rested for a while. In the meantime, i ask him where he's from etc etc. Turns out he's from Rajasthan and barely studied till 7th standard.

Then again he starts, "Why can't something else be used instead of petrol. Now we use gas in rickshaws, why can't gas be used?" Hmm. Good question. Tried to explain how America has the same number of cars as the rest of the world and getting any serious savings on petrol will need them to switch fast to CNG or something... mumble mumble

The explanation doesn't seem convincing. He asks me about HYBRID CARS! Apparently he saw an electric car on the road.
"They run okay no? And they save so much petrol!" Nod nod. Awe. Surprise.
And then the final bomb. "They should make every car run on electricity, lot of problems will be solved. All this drilling-willing for oil doesn't need to be done no?? You educated people should think about all these things." Nod nod. Guilt.

And then promptly he cuts two lanes to his left and yells at the passing cars in the choicest of shudh Hindi abuses.
This guy should be in government...

Ghosts...

2007-06-09T14:47:00.000-07:00

Pictures from a building getting torn down in Juhu Scheme. Shigeru Ban, eat your heart out.
My apologies for the poor picture quality.

Weird Stories Part I...

2007-06-04T06:53:00.000-07:00

Since i have nothing to write about, i will go on a trip down memory lane and find some exciting stories from my really really boring life...

When i was in 12th standard, while going to Kalrashukla Classes in Parle (east) all of us who stayed on the western side and close enough to make it by bus had to get off at a bus stop called Rasraj, with a scenic view of a huge gutter and squatting people every morning...

One day (what i thought was) an urban legend of the 'Sekchool Predator' reached my ears. Apparently two guys and two girls were standing at the bus stop on their way home ('Scream' director, i have a copyright for this story...) and some fat, middle-aged was walking up and down the length of the bus stop and whispering 'sekchool, sekchool' when he got close to the 4 of them. Now before they could do anything about it, their bus came and they thought 'better to just ignore it'. (or maybe they were too chicken to do anything about it...)

The Sekchool Predator laid low for a few days... Till one day he resurfaced and
came across his next victim... me!!! (not such an exciting twist, no?)

This time he approached his lonely victim from the side. i was listening to music for some time and failed to notice the fat, middle-aged man fitting the description of SP. Soon the music stopped and the earplugs came out. i could someone trying to get my attention with some words almost in a whisper. 'Sek, sek' is what the voice said. 'Sek'?? What was that? A unit of time, perhaps? i looked around and SP was pacing up and down the length of the bus stop (very repetitive story, but what to do?). Strange. Then he started using the word that struck terror (ok im over exaggerating) in the hearts of young people all over the world (ok this is definitely over the top): Sekchool.

And then my bus came and i hopped onto it and went home. Never heard from him or about him ever again.
Until of course, some people in college (PD for example) referred to similar incidents at the same bus stop, but that was four years later...

Theories:
1) Desperate guy looking for some 'sek' with anything that moves.
2) Pervert who gets turned on by using the word.
3) Pimp trying to advertise his whores.
4) Guy offering a place for young couples to make out (yes, this was one of the theories that stemmed from the first incident).
5) Prankster out to scare poor, innocent kids.
6) Some lout who has nothing better to do in life.

Moral of the Story: The long awaited bus always comes when the story is just beginning to get interesting...

Doppelganger...

2007-06-02T06:51:00.000-07:00

Me as a South Park character...

This is a really fun site! i spent almost an hour trying to get myself right (in the process got South Park characters for lots of people i know, contact me if you think you are on the list).

Thanks to DG for the referral.

www.sp-studio.de

And yay!! i crossed the 4000 mark on my hit counter! That's quite a sucky number for 1.5 years of this blog, but still....

Numbers...

2007-05-14T09:22:00.000-07:00

Got this forward on orkut. One of the many that try starting a revolution:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Friends!
Petrol in Pakistan Rs17 per litr
Malaysia Rs 18 per litr
In India it's 48 per litr

Why this difference in Asia itself? World Market CRUDE Oil is not the reason for this. It's all Gain for private owners? As we are the general public, or Common Man as R.K.Laxman wud hv said, we have to raise our voice, let's raise thru Emails.Forward this to all Indians who care.

IT HAS BEEN CALCULATED THAT IF EVERYONE DID NOT PURCHASE A DROP OF PETROL FOR ONE DAY AND ALL AT THE SAME TIME, THE OIL COMPANIES WOULD CHOKE ON THEIR STOCKPILES.AT THE SAME TIME IT WOULD HIT THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY WITH A NET LOSS OVER 4.6 BILLION DOLLARS WHICH AFFECTS THE BOTTOM LINES OF THE OILCOMPANIES.

THEREFORE "THURSDAY MAY 22nd " HAS BEEN FORMALLY DECLARED "STICK IT UP THEIR BEHIND " DAY AND THE PEOPLE OF THIS NATION SHOULD NOT BUY A SINGLE DROP OF PETROL THAT DAY.

THE ONLY WAY THIS CAN BE DONE IS IF YOU FORWARD THIS E-MAIL TO AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN AND AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN TO GET THE WORD
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Notice the words "common man", "all indians who care".
Now take the population of India (1 billion plus and counting...)
Now take the number of people who own a car/bike/rickshaw/bus etc etc (Can't be more than 10% of the population)
Now take the number of people who own a computer, an internet connection and an orkut account (measly...)
Now take the number of people out of this tiny measly number who care to forward crap.

SO WHAT MAKES SOME FOOL THINK THAT PETROL WILL NOT BE SOLD ON THE 22ND OF MAY OR ANY OTHER DAY??????????

Vice Versa...

2007-04-16T23:12:00.000-07:00

Where does the whole aggression in cricket ads come from? As a culture we are quite benign about things in general, a feature used by many a fundamentalists to evoke some concerns about our masculinity. But ads like 'ladega to jeetega' with all our cricket stars as tigers or the one where Anil Kumble inspires Irfan Pathan to hit the middle stump in pouring rain seem to be totally opposite of what we seem to be.
i still remember ads like Pepsi's 'Nothing official about it' series and the one with Tendulkar, 'Main kahan hoon??' Two things about them: They seem to look at the lighter side of the sport, and they both featured pre-2000. In fact i can extend this argument to how sports channels push cricket series as 'Qayamat', 'Badla' or whatever else, again seemingly post-2000.
Correlate this with the recent increasing inflaming of passion of cricket fans, effigies being burnt with a few losses, baying for their blood, security outside Tendulkar's house for the first time in his 18 year career and i begin to wonder: Does life inspire the media, or does the media inspire life??

Post-jury nothingness...

2007-04-01T00:11:00.000-07:00

Bhojpuri movie titles as seen near Juhu Beach:
1) Tu Hamaar Hau
2) Kab Kaha Ba I Love You
3) Ganga Ke Paar Sajna Hamaar
4) Ravi Kishan (starring Ravi Kishan as 'Ravi', 'Kishan')
5) Hamaar Se Biyaah Karab De Do

Why do all of them remind me of crappy Hindi movies from the 80's?
And why do all of them have such a huge fan following? Apparently some of them make more money up north than all of that week's Bollywood movies.

Hope...

2007-03-25T05:37:00.000-07:00

Usually the best cricket related ads are the ones that come up after India has crashed out of a major tournament (except maybe the Nike one on top of the buses). They are always trying to say 'Shit! These guys suck!!' , 'Atleast they tried...' and 'They'll do better next time' all at once.

There was one ad after we lost in the Champions Trophy last year. The old man who featured in all of Pepsi's pre-CT ads is sitting before a TV with an India shirt on and it seems India has just lost. His face reddens (Shit! these guys suck!!) and he gets up and throws his India shirt out of the window. Then he walks back to his chair and suddenly gets a nicer expression (Atleast they tried...) on his face. Then he remembers he threw the shirt out of the window and runs back to it only to see some young kid pick up the shirt with cries of 'Ooo Aaah India' in the background (They'll do better next time). The End. All is forgiven and 'our' team will win again. And please keep buying our Pepsi so our team can win.

Maybe the ad guys havent got the time to figure out a consolatory ad yet, but i'm wondering how they'll manage this time.

Healthy, wealthy...

2007-03-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

i think the guy who sells 'fresh, pure, hygienic' soup outside Kaifi Azmi park has the best business idea. What else would sell better? All the fat aunties and uncles who've exhausted themselves trying to lose weight can simply feel better (physically, mentally, spiritually etc etc) by having his product.
And with all the celebs who hang arouind Juhu trying to lose weight, he should take no time to make big big bucks.
The other day, i saw Sanjeev Kapoor (the chef who can't dance) leaving the park with a big frown on his face. Maybe he was thinking 'Why didn't I think of that???' Or maybe he's not used to this exercise....
And of course how could i forget dear Eakta Kkapoor (or are there a few more k's). For the last 4 years, she jogs in front of the college hangout Patel's with her 2 attendants/co-joggers. She hasn't lost half the weight the poor fellows have. In fact they have a more strenous workout. One guy runs with 2 bottles of water and the other carries a strange bag.
And all of this reminds me to start doing something about my paunch, which someone mentions looks another living entity.

To Kingdom Come...

2007-02-25T06:10:00.000-08:00

For some strange reason, i wonder if there's any species of animal/plant that Greenpeace, WWF and their ilk DO NOT want to conserve/protect. Something like a 'Do Not Call' list for animals must be there...??

My candidate for the list is the Mosquito.
What good does it do for humans?
What contribution does it make to the food cycle, food chain and other biology-related diagrams?
Does it have (what a fellow blogger writes about all the time and bores us with) a "Purpose of Life"??
According to Wikipedia (may the makers/conceptualisers/promoters be blessed with a million years of happiness) only the female mosquito sucks blood, that too just because she doesn't get protein from nectar, which makes blood a special treat. Which means we are the mosquito equivalent of chocolate cake.
And the nectar-sucking is not pollinating, so no plants will suffer if they die.
Not to mention the number of diseases that will stop spreading if they don't exist.

Should the mosquito heading towards extinction sound an(other) alarm bell (these environmental alarm bells seem to ring every few hours)?? Will Greenpeace activists get onto a fuel-cell or steam-run truck and try to block mosquito exterminators from doing their work?

Will i become a social pariah for suggesting genocide of mosquitoes?

Revolution...

2007-02-18T06:43:00.000-08:00

ARCHITECTURAL INTERNS OF THE WORLD UNITE!!!!

You don't have to work a pittance for anybody!

All the work you do is the backbone of any firm's business. If YOU don't produce those working drawings (however simple, brainless or mind-numbing they are) then NO ONE will.

No contractor will make a building from concept sketches that your employers give them. YOU decide how much money your employer makes.

It is your right to demand good salaries for yourself. i know firms that make crores of rupees in profit every year because they hire only interns.

The 1500 bucks you get every month does not even cover travel costs. It is a great privilege to work with Charles Correa, but if he doesn't respect your value to his firm, then it's of no use.

If every single intern in the country decides, "I will not work for less than Rs. 7500 a month" every architectural firm in the country will either fall in line or shut down. If engineering graduates get 20,000 bucks a month the minute they finish a crappy 4-year course (and then get paid the same amount for a 6-month 'training' period), then we deserve at least half of that.

And everytime i hear architects say "We used to get 500 bucks a month when we were your age," i feel like hitting them with their T-squares.

The image and the text: Ironic, no?

To the ones who get bored with long posts: HAPPY????????

And i take my words back. i will let my posts go longer than 20 words!

The Crow...

2007-02-12T07:04:00.000-08:00

Every day around 11 am in the morning, a crow with a weird 'caaack' sound sits on the parapet below the kitchen window and yells its little lungs out. My mom feeds it bits of chapati everyday, usually the first one off the pan, which doesn't taste too good. Usually i feed it on Sundays.
It's probably the closest i've come to having a pet. Some animal you can recognise just by its voice, one which you feed everyday, one who recognises you. So maybe this is the closest i've come to feeling the loss of a pet. The crow's been missing the last 2 Sundays i've been at home, and apparently it hasn't 'caaacked' in the intermittent weeks.
RIP crow. May you be fed your one chapati wherever you are.

S,M,X,XL

2007-02-06T07:02:00.000-08:00

By popular demand, henceforth all posts on this blog shall be no longer than 20 sentences.

Hiranandani...

2007-01-30T07:04:00.000-08:00

Why do most people take the word 'critical' so literally? Why does 'being critical' involve finding only negative aspects of something? As if pointing out faults can make one seem more intellectual. And most of the time, this 'being critical' ends up being 'i hate this, it's so banal/terrible/horrible...' which are all just better words for 'yuck'. And i always thought being critical meant understanding a whole system for what it is, thoroughly. An understanding of something on a more fundamental or basic level.
Which takes me to a very pertinent issue: Why do most architects hate Hafeez Contractor's contribution to architecture? Why do words like 'ugly', 'disgusting' (more synonyms of yuck) seem to attempt to describe his work in a word. Although i belonged to this bunch once upon a time, i can safely say it's more important to understand why Hafeez's work or the 'Hafeez aesthetic' is so popular before decrying it. If it has started a spate of buidings that look the same, it must have something in it to be copied. i have to mention i'm not taking sides here... or maybe i am, but it really doesn't matter because as someone said, maybe we need to understand what Hafeez does before saying how good or bad his work is.
When Hiranandani starts off constructing buildings, they do two radically different things from other builders of their time.
One: They ensure a high quality of construction, something which most people who bought houses in the 1980's can relate to. And even as a prospective househunter now, what is very apparent is the high level of finishing that they achieve for seemingly the same construction cost.
Two: They may be the first private developers who buy a large tract of land and develop it through and through: not just planning roads and plots (like Lokhandwala) or building stereotype residential buildings (like the Rahejas) but they attempt at creating a new lifestyle visible not just in the names of their roads (they're called Avenues and Boulevards! wonder why the American dream becomes the Indian dream) and street furniture (wooden benches and fancy lamp posts.. in our weather).
Now this may be an arbitrary (doubt this..) decision, but it lets a post-1991 middle class associate with a very western idea of sub-urbanity, what with paved roads and hedges and all... now the only thing missing from the picture-perfect image are the little houses set back in a yard with a picket fence. What instead has happened are these 20 storey towers which totally destroy the scale that the master plan sets out for itself. But the buildings make up in the loss of scale with even more opulent ideas of living, with a large lobby, exquisite finishing etc. where the interior actually sets the standard for a upper middle class residential building. The exterior is an arbitrary skin for a building that's quite malformed and out of scale. (i mean what formal or aesthetic lanuguage has been followed for a tympanum that hides a hexagonal water tank?). But these rarely matter for someone who's house hunting who's first priority is a good layout which allows a certain desirable level of privacy, a house that does not leak and a living room that doesnt allow the visitor to look into the bedroom. The buildings end up looking oddly proportioned and out of scale on the outside completely, but maybe that not the lens we need to look through for these buildings. Also for all the claims of post-modernism, they seem to be misplaced totally considering that neither are the elements interpreted differently from the source nor are they referring to any significant vernacular histories. Maybe the only thing it caters to is the love of the ornate and the baroque that is seemingly so characteristic of the new middle class.
Unfortunately, it is the skin of the building that stands for what initially made this kind of architecture popular. It seems the Hafeez facade has become the representative of the object itself. As of now, when i see the same elevational elements popping out on all corners of Mumbai, i wonder if a minimalist facade in the early days of Hiranandani Powai would have resulted in similar buildings all over Mumbai.
This is not to say that apart from the facade nothing is wrong with this kind of construction. The whole of Powai Hiranandani has been built in the most ecologically insensitive manner, with hills being cut up for landscaping (how ironic!) and a lot of under the table deals to change land uses, reservations etc. One only has to talk to the residents of surrounding areas to know what the 40 -storey tall towers have done to the water supply and electric supply in the area. In Powai exists a gaothan, which has been severely damaged culturally as well as spatially by the new construction. The whole complex is a drain on resources, a lot of the resources spent on creating this sense of opulence, with spotlighting on all night for all the commercial buildings and sprinklers working to create that ever green hedge. And the whole process now repeats itself in a more ecologically sensitive Ghodbunder Road area.
What i find a little worrisome is how the whole process of building as started by this involves gated communities living as a parallel city within the larger fabric. Also, the model seems to be the American suburbia with all its inherent problems not just socially but on smaller scales too (Think American Beauty).
It also worries me when Hafeez comes on a news channel and says we need more FSI without considering what it will do to the city. The complex he designed is itself an example of what high FSI can do to a neighbourhood.

DISCLAIMER:
The point of this post was not to praise or decry Hafeez Contractor or Hiranandani Constructions, but attempt at a neutral understanding of his work. My resources have not been any big books or some people but just observations as a wannabe architect and opinions as a househunter. If you have misunderstood any of my intentions, then i warn you now not to post any comment, otherwise all hell shall break loose. Thank you.
Hehehe.

KBC Tritiya...

2007-01-28T05:26:00.000-08:00

After wondering for days what makes KBC 3 more comfortable to watch than its predecessors, comes a quote from one of the producers of the show that sums it up: People tend to relate to AB from a kneeling position, while they're more open armed with SRK.

So maybe the 'This one's not as classy' remark finally found an explanation.

Redevelopment...

2007-01-19T06:57:00.000-08:00

We had a discussion in Theory of Design class the other day about something completely off the syllabus, but something really interesting atleast to me. The professor (sounds so weird to call the guy who takes the class, but still...) was wondering if any of us were even asking the question whether the kind of re-development we're doing in Dharavi with our 40 different projects was really the kind needed. For the uninitiated, the college, the Design Cell and the 4th year studio is working on a plan (the "people's alternative" as every presentation calls it) for the redevelopment of Dharavi in opposition to a plan made by a developer. And ironically, the guy who asks this question is also the guy who's heading the Design Cell in this project.
The point is that every time we think of slum redevelopment, we see it simply as providing a building with a certain number of floors that house a certain number of slum families, the overall emphasis being on providing a larger house with a toilet and bathroom. As one of my classmates was kind enough to point out 'We're giving them closed services which is a boon for them'. All the buildings look like any building housing the middle class. Which is natural, since we are all from a closeted middle class background with all the darkness in life stowed away from us and nothing makes us feel more safer and secure than 'cleaning up' some messy parts of the city. And it blends in with one of the objectives of the studio which is to find a way to improve the quality of life of the residents of Dharavi.
However what i find amiss in all our projects (im not excluding myself here too) are objectives 2 and 3 of the studio: Retaining existing community patterns; and Retaining existing economic activity.
Let me start with objective 3: Retaining existing economic activity. Dharavi is a hotbed of indutrial activity and it was surprising to see that happening in a place constantly referred to as a black hole. Although the label on your jeans says Levi's or you feel comfy that your shirt is from Globus, we've seen both being manufactured in one of the close to 1,00,000 tenements in the area. Unfortunately, a lot of this industrial activity is illegal, like tanning of leather. A lot of the industries operate while flouting many of the ineffective labour laws. People work in a tenement from 7 in the morning until 7 in the evening when residents of the tenement come home from their workplace in another part of the clum. In effect, the industry in the area works only because the slum is invisible to the powers that be. As one leather exporter who works out of a tenement mentioned, it is impossible for him to run a business outside of Dharavi, with a particular number of holidays, limited shifts, strikes, labour laws etc. This guy makes enough profits and contributes so much of it as tax to the Government, a fact he mentions very proudly. He hires enough employees to have trouble with a union and deal with a holiday for every time a national leader decides to die. His export clients include Versace and Gucci, none of whom care where their product comes from.
The fact that most redevelopment schemes miss out on is the legal status of these industries. Most of them dwell and succeed in the darkness, the ostracisation of the slum from society, the unwillingness of the law to eneter such a space. Legality by providing a tenement or an industrial gala would be suicide. No one knows exactly how many people live in these slums, but every one agrees most work within Dharavi itself. How many industries can be shut down and how many jobs can be lost before we realise we cannot retain existing economic activity with a gentrified redevelopment scheme?
Objective #2: Existing community patterns. i do not need to tell anybody that there is a difference in a 7-storey building housing a community and a slum sprawl housing the same. The relationship that develops on a horizontal plane cannot be replicated on a vertical one. So where does the question of providing existing community patterns to remain occur? Herding one community into one building does not mean one has managed to retain community patterns.

If someone has read the argument on objective #3 and wonders if it is unfair to the 'legitimate' businesses in the city, i would say i agree with that. But the point here is to question the objectives themselves and not come up with newer ones. If concern about legitimate businesses is an objective then there can be another post about that. Similarly if the objective is to free up land for the city then redevelopment is probably a good way of achieving it.

i feel that objectives 2&3 are extremely crucial and volatile. Any kind of ambitious plan to redevelop would invariably lead to a corruption of these objectives. In such a case maybe objective #1 should be the only objective that allows some kind of intervention, some kind of intervention that achieves an upgradation of the standard of living but with minimal scarring on the fabric of the slum. Something that allows the slum to retain its character as that part of the city that fell through the cracks. i am not romanticising the slum here, but merely making a point that every city needs its "black hole", just like every human being has some bad habits. If the concern is for the inhabitants of the black hole, then an insert that addresses JUST that concern is absolutely crucial. Trying to eliminate the darkness in a city would simply supplant the darkness. If redevelopment does occur, most of these industries and the people will move to the fringes of the city, until gentrification catches up with that too, and then another black hole and then another....

i may not be aware of a clear solution, but some examples N.P. quoted and some studies and experiments carried out in Brazil and Indonesia may provide the answer. http://web.mit.edu/urbanupgrading/sponsor/ActionPlan.pdf has an interesting charter spelling out some of these things. Maybe this argument will take me nowhere as passing 4th year Design becomes more important than standing up for what i think. But i hope this brings out a better discussion than the one in TOD class, which finally ended up discussing 'Let's just throw out these wretched people who've taken our land and live on our taxes.'

That's all.

Web 2.0...

2007-01-11T06:26:00.000-08:00

Time magazine recently came up with their annual 'Person of the Year' issue and it voted 'YOU' as The Person. (The Man is what i was aiming for, but political correctness has drowned me in its whirlpool...) What for? For making sure that a more interactive internet works and prospers. And so today i decided i will make a contribution to Web 2.0 (that's what the "democratic internet" is called) and write another blog post ABOUT NOTHING. And visit Wikipedia and check out their article about HALF LIFE 2. Or ibnlive.com and vote on some crappy survey asking 'Who is better - Amitabh or Shahrukh?' Or simply go to Google Earth and find out that Mumbai is better detailed after the construction industry was opened up to foreign builders.
Web 2.0 is the dawn of the democratic internet. An internet that makes sure that every person who uses it leaves his/her mark behind on it. And the only mark i can seem to leave behind are useless comments on some useless issue or join a orkut community 'I Hate Himesh Reshammiya'.
Person of the Year!! Congratulations!!!

Expressing unwanted opinions...

2006-12-29T08:22:00.000-08:00

i realised what people mean when they say they get 'intimidated' by other people's opinions. After attending a two-day conference on the emergence of a new urbanism with all kinds of anthropologists, historians, social scientists and deep-thinking architects, every opinion of mine gets checked and double-checked in my mind, for every possible mis-pronounced word and words with alternate meanings. While i construct the sentence, lunch/tea is called, and that's the end of that. And what makes it worse is the 'I'm drawing from the work of XYZ when I say....' and 'I think it was XYZ and I who discussed this a few days ago...' What makes academicians talk to just each other in a crowd of 150? Or what's the obsession with the metaphor and the romanticism rather than the actual comparison? And the almost complete submission to leftist politics?

But the point of this post is not to complain about feeling left out of what was obviously a gathering of smarter people, rather archive for myself some opinions. Maybe they'll change over the years or even weeks.

One is obviously regarding the changing morphology of the city. Although physically the city is undergoing a change in image, i would think the older networks have still remained largely intact, although some have been pushed underground or into the background. All the uproar of the mall being the temple of the modern city is probably unfounded. Now i know i'll be killed for this comparison, but i feel malls to a large extent are what the mills were to the 60's. Both are simply the signifiers of the prevalent economic system, not necessarily being the main contributers to it. Lots of data indicates that mills actually handled a small part of the whole textile process, a lot of it being outsourced to smaller towns and smaller set ups since the 1920s. Malls are following a similar (maybe even more insignificant) process, serving as merely marketing tools. Most shops (except the so called marquee ones) don't break even, but the exposure to a ravenously consumeristic middle class helps other outlets of the same 'brand' located in the traditional shopping areas to get some kind of brand recognition. Compare with M.G. Road in Bangalore with a similar trend of image-making outlets, while their factory outlets end up finishing the sale.

The next one is about new methods of entrepreneurship in the city. Now the problem with talking about this is sometimes we totally fall short of words. Traditional terminology, most of emerging out of a modernist urge to clean up and simplify, has simply not kept pace with development of these new forms of space. Take a simple land use classification. How do you define a space that is an industry from 7 to 7 and becomes residential for the remaining part of the day? Or the space under a staircase which has a tailoring establishment, with the workers living in it? Or for that matter a rickshaw, for whom two pictures of Kareena Kapoor on the side panels makes it home? We talk about emerging urbanisms and emerging typologies, but no emerging terminology. And this is not just about wanting to come up with a hep new word or two. Classifying or defining wrongly or incompletely totally restricts one's imagination of the space. Putting every space into one of 3 separate boxes is simply being slow to accept new trends. Maybe looser definitions might help?

And if someone wonders why i couldn't say all this 2 days ago, i have no one to blame except myself and maybe one person who's name begins with So and ends with jamin, who made it perfectly clear, even without knowing i exist, how unread and gawaar i was. May your brain's memory cells be transplanted into mine.

In the news today...

2006-12-27T08:16:00.000-08:00

Hot and sexy Himess-bhai is out with his own line of casuals (also, i hope, soon: nasal drops and razor blades) and making a stand for lardful people the world over by posing with his innumerable tyres poking out of what seems to be a very loose jacket. Hepy new year to him...

In the middle of one of Khar's bylanes are some tin patris with a board saying 'MMRDA - Bare with us for a better tomorrow'. So far, the road hasn't been hammered out of shape. Vehicles dutifully going slow near the sign actually hammer their heads after seeing MMRDA's new method of irritation.

Two AD Singhs slugging it out for their brand name (yes! that's what one of them calls his name!!!) in page 3. One of them (the 25-yr old sardar) just maybe a classmate of my brother's. Are you the same Amit Duggal who was called 'Dug-dug-dug-dug-Duggallllll-Dugallllllllllll' in school?? Can that be your 'brand name' now?

South Africa's cricket team has now officially decided to call themselves 'India B'. If the uproar over a single defeat and 'aaj hero, kal zero' treatment at home wasn't enough, the inability to play pace bowling broke the last straw on the camel's back.

'I See You' now graces my favourite billboard, after Sanober and her thunder thighs held sway for a few weeks following 'Don's one-month reign up there.

To RGV: Enough with the Mumbai underworld already!!!

Myths and sundry things

2006-12-24T07:24:00.000-08:00

It always perplexes (wow, that's a tongue twister! and also rhymes with multiplexes... sorry im digressing) me to see the amount of time we decide to see the same story countless times without any twists in it. How many times do i want to see a Ramayana with the same emphasis on how perfect Ram was and how he was dealt with so badly?
That's why it was a little surprising for me to see a serial called 'Ravan' yesterday on T.V. and what absolutely shocked me was the fact that Ravan was NORMAL. He didn't interject his sentences with 'Muhahahahahhahaha'. He talked sensibly all the time. He didn't plan to loot, pillage or rape anything. Best of all, he tells someone he's gonna get screwed because his dad messed up with the gods. Imagine the Ravan of lore doing that!
i am reminded of Amita Kanekar telling us in 3rd year that the Mahabharata had 13 versions, one of them having the Pandavas as the bad guys and the Kauravas the good ones. Which might explain why i was such a confused child regarding the Mahabharata. Yudi loved to gamble, Arjun was a transsexual/crossdresser, Bhima was a cheater in battle and Krishna was the Emraan Hashmi of his times of all. And Duryodhana, whose biggest crime seemed to be wanting to be king, was the bad guy. Go figure.
Every few days the Bible is re-interpreted and newer additions made to it, Shakespeare's plays are adapted to the Mumbai underworld or the Hindi heartland, but rarely do i see a re-telling of our myths. i wanna see a story or play where Ravan and Sita elope to save Sita from a bad marriage. i don't think it's too tough to do, is it? Oh wait, the V.H.P. may be reading this....

Power...

2006-12-23T00:50:00.000-08:00

This week i was part of a workshop in college in which a classmate and i were assigned to be teaching assistants, and due to certain unavoidable circumstances ended up running it. And i don't wanna run anything anymore.

i don't want people to stop talking to me cos i didn't cheat on their attendance

i don't want to lose years of friendship over a difference of opinion

i don't want to feel responsible for every second someone is behind schedule

i don't want to yell at people cos im getting panicky

i don't think i can handle power

That's all.

Slumming it Out...

2006-12-09T08:34:00.001-08:00

Various documents remind me that as Indians, we have no right to land. We are simply caretakers of land for the government to claim when they arbitrarily choose to. Atleast in all of this, they could be a little honest.
Dharavi has opened my middle class, closeted eyes to a whole new world of wheeling-dealing. Claims are made of being the authority on the area by everyone. Some of whom we are against, some we work with. The ones we are against have engaged in fudging records and statistics so much that in the eventual rehabilitation, 40% of those who need to be rehoused will be left without any means of shelter. Which means on one hand we'll see multi storeyed SRA apartments, and on the other hand hundreds of shanties refusing to move. And you and i, the privileged few of this country will say, 'See these shameless slum dwellers. Even after constructing so many buildings for them, they still choose to live in those jhopadpattis.' The ones who we are working with sell dreams to these slum dwellers of living in SRA apartments. After months of effort (and don't forget money) spent by these slumdwellers in trying to get the dream in motion, when the dream gets caught up in red tape, they say 'Look at these shameless slum dwellers. We did so much for them and they show no energy, and now they complain that nothing is happening.'

So what is worse. Selling dreams or selling livelihoods?

Hmm...

2006-12-07T07:09:00.000-08:00

The shirt joins in the celebrations too...
Post #96.. getting close to a century!

Chain Reactions...

2006-11-30T07:18:00.001-08:00

i am now convinced that riots are organised and orchestrated to the point of planning the 'outraging' event as well. i did not hear of any statue getting desecrated or even touched in the few days before the riots started. Nor has any news channel shown the body of the dead 23 yr old Dalit, but hours of screen time for, presumably, his weeping mother. And if it is such a 'spontaneous' reaction, then why appeal to the leaders of the Dalit parties to stop the rioting?

Rioting obviously is not merely a reaction to an incident, but tries to extract it's pound of flesh as well. Here, the 'pound of flesh' is ludicrous. A holiday on December 6th? What for? So that an already ineffectual government gets an extra day to doze off? Atleast demand something better, like reservations or something. Or is the Dalit community's self-respect at such a low, even after 60 years of pampering, that a holiday in the name of a dead leader will make them feel better???
But amidst all the rioting and ransacking and looting, it was nice to hear that there were no innocent lives lost. The only ones dead are some rioters. Good for them.

2006-11-26T02:41:00.000-08:00

The Thesis Blog is up and running
http://the-thesis-blog.blogspot.com

2006-11-24T08:05:00.000-08:00

Poster of 'Huballi'.. notice the larger than life worm's eye view

My funky green Goa shirt

Another movie poster.. notice Rajkumar on the top left hand corner "blessing" the movie.

Rickshaw driver's licence

The old, the new and the unchanged

Vijay Mallya's contribution to the world of architecture. Very art deco.. or a shrunken copy of Empire State building

Alien...

2006-11-24T07:27:00.000-08:00

3 weeks in an alien land. Actually, three alien lands.

First, Bangalore/Bengalooru/I.T. City. Although my dad's from Karnataka, i
don't know one sentence of Kannada except saying 'Kannada Barudilla' and
counting upto ten, that one courtesy of some Kannada comedy seen on TV ten years ago. Made it interesting to talk to rickshaw drivers, especially when Abhimanyu pointed out road names on the Eicher map to a confused one. But by the end of the trip learnt one cool phrase thanks to N.C. Rao: Mella Yenta!!!! And some useful ones like Sullimagga.. used only for errant rickshaws.
The three-in-one city is damn weird. It supposedly runs on IT but shuts at 11 (even nightclubs!!!). Rickshaws have sexy electronic meters and highly visible driver's licences but charge at their drivers' whims. Lots of green spaces but 'Keep off the grass' signs. And a flyover with a traffic signal at the top (talk about mistakes...).
The identity crisis in the city (and the state is large) is apparent at every turn. Cox Town and Fraser Town are neighbours with Basavanagudi and Koramangalam. The lack of any famous home grown Kannada heroes and heroines leads to film stars (even minor ones) elevated to god-like status. And now Bangalore's identity crisis between Pensioners' Paradise, Kannada Pride and IT Hotspot will surely lead to name-changes, a lot like Mumbai's been facing over the last twenty years.
But i don't mean to bad mouth the city. It's nice and pretty and the weather's quite awesome. Policemen are nice, rickshaw drivers are chatty and people are generally not bothered with someone holding a video camera in their face. It's just that i feel Mumbai gets jealous when i start liking another city. hehe...
And i simply loved their movie posters! Unfortunately couldn't get the one i wanted to take home, almost ripped it off a wall once. The poster is for a movie called 'Hubballi' which is a small city in the north of Karnataka. Looks nothing like in the movie. Cool poster. Found the hero's restaurant while walking under the signal flyover. He's bought over the neighbouring two buildings also...

Next comes Goa. Wow! Never been there since i was ten, which i realise was not the correct age to go there. Don't need to say more. Spoke in Konkani confidently to lots of locals, especially after a couple of days there. Bought my first authentic festive shirt!!! Notice the 'Reebok' tag on the collar...
Surely won't be wearing it ever again though!

And my native place, the seemingly unpronounceable Bankikodla (try again if you didn't get it right the first time). Went there after 10 years. Didn't recognise most people, but remembered the crossroad near the house perfectly. Odd how one remembers spaces more clearly than people sometimes. Even within the house, i remembered the exact layout of the living room with the one glass pane on the roof while looking at a cousin like i've never seen him before.

And after all that, i realised that the things i miss the most while i'm away are the things i hate the most when i'm here.

And i may have a thesis blog... so check that out when i put up the link.

Shameless advertising.

Xtra Innings...

2006-10-30T08:40:00.000-08:00

Today i saw an ad on tv with Mandira Bedi in her 'babe' persona saying 'Watching cricket with me is different..' (imagine attempts at sauciness oozing out of your screen). Very true. Apparently, more women are watching cricket than ever before. Which is strange considering the amount of hue and cry the spagetti top evoked. But the show is evil (to paraphrase Georgie boy) and Navjot Singh Sidhu makes it worse. The pro-India bent is embarassing. Discussing how India will fare in a match 2 weeks from now is bad, discussing the same 20 minutes before Australia play West Indies is worse. Even the numerologists and tarot card readers say 'Today I think I will support India' even before their cards or numbers have spoken (or do what they.. erm.. do). And Rohit Roy who considers himself an expert just cause he's played gulli cricket adds to the gallery of dumbfucks who host the show. The number of experts is always out numbered by the number of hosts. Everything smarter people say is drowned out by Sidhu's long distance call bellowing.
We are generally an intelligent cricket watching public and we deserve better. Otherwise any discussion on cricket is bound to be dominated by 'Did you see Mandira's sari today?'

Memories...

2006-10-23T11:08:00.000-07:00

While sorting my cluttered and overloaded computer, i decided to organise my stuff which went the whole gamut from cad drawings to obscure sound clips from 6 years ago. And came across a whole set of pictures from 1st year. Now shamefully i have to say that once you join architecture, you have no life for 5 years. So the people in your class become your family. The same shiny, happy people in 1st year seem so different now. i saw a study trip picture of people working together on some slide or something for kids and it seemed like it happened yesterday. But out of the 4 people in the picture, i can't stand two and the other two aren't as close as we used to be. So what changed since yesterday? Any argument, any issue was sorted out in 30 mins flat. And now we can't even decide a date on which to leave for our last ever study trip.

Does getting older neccessarily mean i am getting wiser? Or just more smug about my own wisdom?

Diwali Day...

2006-10-21T04:12:00.000-07:00

Feels nice to wake up without having a schedule at the back of your head. i'm sure my comp feels so much more happier that i'm not opening Autocad anymore. It kinda gave up before i did... 2 days before a submission!! And it's nauseating (by association, i guess) to sit in front of the comp. But i shall fight all that. Its the first day of a (really short) vacation... the first one since 3rd year started!!! Happy diwali to me, i guess...
Saw 'Don'. The Shahrukh version. Have already written about it and have tarnished it even before i could see it. And as usual, its foot-in-mouth time. But before i jump onto the new movie, i should mention i have never seen the original one. So unlike all the reviewers and the oldies who've seen the old one when they were my age and are seeing this one with a nostalgic bent, i can claim that my view of the movie are neutral. Except for the anti-Shahrukh bias.
First, the music. The songs suck. The background score is awesome, going with the pace and the feel of the movie, in fact rescuing some scenes in patches.
Whatever snatches of the old movie ive seen make it look almost cartoonish in its appeal. This one is so slick, i can re-oil my car by just sticking a poster of 'Don' on it's bonnet (sorry for that).
Arjun 'mumble-mumble' Rampal is miserable. Kareena sizzles in just the one song she gets to do. Priyanka Chopra, hot as ever. Isha Koppikar, non-existent. Two performances stand out though. One is Boman Irani as DCP D'Silva. Never imagined the funny man to give such a serious and sedate performance.
And Shahrukh Khan goes back to his 'Darr' days and gives a bone-chilling performance as Don. In fact, when his 'Vijay' avatar came up, it almost made me wish i could fast-forward to the real deal. For the first few minutes, it takes a little getting-used-to to see him in this role. But that's just me and my prejudices. Slowly, you see the effort to make it as different from Vijay or Rahul or whatever. The evil glint in the eye and the childish yet maniacal attitude makes it one of the best character treatments this year. Although Shahrukh hams a few scenes, its still a good performance.
The retro look to some song picturisations and the almost 'flower-power' clothes worn by the males in some scenes try too hard to make a connection the 70s. 'Khaike Paan Banaraswala' gets a new twist with Shahrukh's energy.
The movie has some nice touches. The fleur-de-lis print shirt in 'Khaike..' is obviously well publicised. The other one is not. Shahrukh and his henchman walk into a high security safe where all the drugs and stuff are stashed away. In the corner is a painting barely noticeable yet instantly recognisable as Munch's Scream, stolen a couple of years ago in broad daylight. The painting was found a few weeks ago, around the time the movie was deep into post-production... coincidence??

Speed post II...

2006-10-12T12:41:00.000-07:00

Most dramas on the many Hindi channels we get here are family-oriented with a dominating female/male and many secondary characters.

Most comedies on the few English channels we get here are family-oriented with a dominating male/female and many secondary characters.

Thats all.

Question...

2006-10-09T10:43:00.000-07:00

What are the chances of someone drinking tea and throwing the paper cup in some bushes such that it falls upright; and leaking water from an A/C on the 1st floor drips right into it??

(i'm really asking... cos i saw one today. And am really interested to know what odds that had...)

Billboard...

2006-10-08T10:16:00.000-07:00

My favourite billboard has transformed itself again. (must write a book on it some day) This time into a slick 'Matrix'- green poster of Shahrukh 'Rahul' Khan trying to look uber-cool in Farhan Akhtar's Don. Trailers look slick. Priyanka Chopra looks hot (when doesn't she?). Kareena looks like Princess Leia for some reason. And Shahrukh is Shahrukh. In fact, there's no difference in the outstretched arms as well. 'Mitwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa' becomes 'Main Hoon Donnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn'. Only difference being the black suit. And the glass of champagne. And no violins (thank God for that!!). He doesn't seem to make a good 'Don'. Unfortunately, i'm so prejudiced while watching movies that every time i see Shahrukh, i see 'Rahul' or 'Raj' or 'Dev' or whatever KJo wants him to be tonight. Maybe after 'Baazigar' and 'Darr' he might have been grey enough to be Don, but not now after years of playing the diabetically saccharine characters he's played.

And on a completely different note, 2006 seems to be the year of the broken dream. Old fogeys France gallantly and steadily progress till the finals and lose to (corrupt and evil and moneyminded) Italy in the World Cup. While Schumacher, on the verge of retirement, comes this close to a seventh World Championship and loses to cranky baby Alonso. We need some angels with loads of miracle dust next year.

Orkut part 2...

2006-10-07T10:43:00.000-07:00

After months of orkutting, scrapping and other assorted -ings, i have a few questions:
1) Why does the number of communities you join directly proportional to the amount of interest you have in each of them?
2) Why do all communities from 'Keira Knightley fan club' to 'I Hate Pakistan' have the post 'What does the person above you remind you of?' as the most replied to?
3) If someone scraps you while you're online, is it rude to not reply?
4) Similarly, is it rude to suggest you chat on messenger?
5) And when you chat on messenger, why does one realise there's nothing to talk about?
6) Does Google Inc. have a magic wand?

Self-Image...

2006-09-30T23:07:00.000-07:00

We are a nation of extremes in all cases. There could be a brand new Porsche and a bullock cart sharing the same lane in a major city. And while a small percentage of our population flies first class, the majority cannot afford to ride in a bus. But we seem to WANT to take the better side of the extreme as representative of India. Fool ourself into thinking that the average is closer to the best than the worst. And that extends to how we interpret events in the world as well.
Take the recent UN bungle about election of a new Secretary-General. We support a New York born, London-based author called Shashi Tharoor, whose parents were in India at some point in their distant personal histories. But imagine him to be, nonetheless, an Indian. As if him getting elected would result in the world recognising that we are after all a superpower. If one simply clears the emotional baggage accompanying a person of Indian origin, i think we would all realise that Shashi Tharoor is as Indian as say Kofi Annan was Ghanian. (which i'm sure many didn't know). And to make matters worse, the fact that Tharoor may not get elected is seen as some kind of national insult in the media. The other day, i see a question on a news channel, 'Does India get taken seriously at the UN?' or something like that. And one of the SMS responses was 'Can you imagine the UN without India?' as if it was but natural to throw one's head back, laugh and say 'NO!!'
Unfortunately, we need to realise that we are as important (or should i say un-important) to the UN or the world as maybe Ghana. The only time the UN talks about us is when one of our peacekeepers dies in Somalia. And when we do get discussed, it somehow becomes an indication that 'we have arrived on the world stage'.
This post is turning into one where it seems i'm indicating the UN to be some important world body. When in fact, it is not. How long can we as a country fool ourselves in institutions that have lost its relevance? Whether its the UN or the Non-Aligned Movement (that massive fraud of neutrality which its founders gave up within a few months of establishing it), our pride on the world stage seems inexplicably linked to how we are seen on this irrelevant platforms. And when something miniscule in proportion does occur, our chests swell up.
The U.S. is the bully of the world. And we made the unfortunate mistake of latching our wagon on another bully, who long ago shifted schools. Now we seem to be like the teacher's pet, feeling very happy when the teacher gives us a gold star. But its recess time and the bully controls the class. And however many gold stars we get, the bully and his cronies will have the last say. So we sit smugly and count our gold stars while the bully and his cronies steal our lunch money.
And marvel saying 'Oh, we've finally arrived!'

Small World...

2006-09-26T04:56:00.000-07:00

Did anyone know there's a town called (hold your breath) KRVIA?????

www.traveljournals.net/explore/albania/map/m159489/krvia.html

Reminds me of a joke, totally politically incorrect but that's how i like them...

An eye doctor gets a Czech patient. He tells him to read a chart that has the following letters:
B W R I E T A F S I C Z
He asks the patient, 'Can you figure out what's written?'
The Czech says, 'Sure! I dated his daughter once!'

Headlines...

2006-09-24T01:59:00.000-07:00

Today i read the following headlines:

OSAMA MAY BE DEAD, SAYS FRENCH NEWSPAPER

BUSH DENIES OSAMA DEATH REPORTS

U.S. AND PAKISTAN TO INTENSIFY HUNT FOR OSAMA

OIL PRICES DOWN TO $57

Now if there's a conspiracy here, i wish the newspaper would simply spell it out on one page. It takes some time to turn the pages and make the connection, although it's SOOO obvious....

Weekends...

2006-09-23T06:57:00.000-07:00

Why doesn't a weekend seem like a weekend any more? My bro in the U.S. lives it up every Friday - Sunday. He seems to be doing the most un-him things, things that he would have never dreamt of doing (or got out of bed long enough to). And actually thinks that i would like to listen to detailed descriptions of his bungee jumpin/white water rafting/hitting head on wall without feeling a tad bit envious.
And here i sit before my comp's new LCD screen wondering if my schedule will get upset if i just sit and read a book for 15 minutes.
And the only source of excitement all day has been the red and green dots that come in front of my eyes when i turn away from the screen. (Wheee!!!They're dancing!!!)
And you can see how bored i am...
And i'm absolutely sure i'm not drunk or high...

Professionalism...

2006-09-16T00:15:00.000-07:00

One more gem from the Indian media:

'We don't know whether Musharraf and Manmohan Singh will merely shake hands or hug. Right now there's lots of speculation and heated debate here in Havana regarding that."

This one from CNN-IBN and i swear to God the reporter was serious....

Home Improvement...

2006-09-13T02:22:00.000-07:00

After more than a year of complaining, cribbing and being cynical about how my peer group hates anything to do with thinking or growing mentally etc etc (which i'm sure everyone agrees is THE cause of this blog... and its title.. and its web address), i finally decided to take the advice of someone who i don't like too much and decided to do things that i would find interesting, whether or not someone else does and hopefully find other similar minded people.
So task # 1 was to start reading again. Started off with something veryyyyy light to get myself back in the groove. Beach Boy by Ardeshir Vakil. Decent book. A little predictable though and gets a little unrealistic at times but a good start. Next came something i heard about through the 'Environmental Design' elective group. A book called 'Collapse' which says that basically every single civilizational collapse is caused by environmental problems. Read the weirdest excuse for India's caste system: apparently the reason why it was invented is so each caste could protect their own resources to prevent over-use....
Task # 2 is attempting to watch movies... not the KANK types, but the ones Rohan writes about so often. Caught the first 3 obstructions (??!!) of 'The 5 Obstructions' as i was procrastinating about A.D. And also saw 'Roger and Me' with the film theory elective people. And now i know i'm bored and irritated with Michael Moore's i'll-shove-a-camera-in-your-face-whether-you-like-it-or-not type movies.
Task # 3 was shutting myself off from the 'Why do we need to think?' comments that one gets to hear so often in class. And it's not working too much. And the need to reflect that frustration onto this blog was toooooo over bearing. And i tried to immerse myself more into tasks #1 and #2 and also a bit in A.D.

Hence: no post (hehehehhee... long explanation no?)

And ya, before you wonder which elective i'm in... it's called 'Urban Theory' and i haven't seen the guy who's supposed to be doing that elective for 4 weeks. He said he won't come for one Saturday but hasn't turned up for the remaining three too. So can someone check up on him??

Blogger's Block...

2006-08-25T09:49:00.000-07:00

What makes it worse is when one has settled into a comfortable routine where one post comes up every few days... and now i sit in front of the screen and wonder: what do i write???
It would be easy to make this a bitch-blog. But i do not aim to use this blog to create a false sense of superiority.
It would be easy to make it a record of mundane events in my daily routine. But i don't have such an interesting life. Do i write what is happening in my sucky, frustrating life? Or do i need to have such detailed documentation of it??
So far, i write when i feel like writing about things that i might have something to say about. So it's a diary...
But it's not a diary either, cos it's out for the whole world to see.
So what is this blog?
i tend to treat it as a make-believe opinion column in a make-believe newspaper with a circulation of 1. So does that make it personal? Or does the fact that 1696 people have read my posts make it public?
And therein lies the identity crisis. And the blogger's block. And this rambling post.

Pigs...

2006-08-20T11:41:00.000-07:00

This week was quite bad for the cricketing world. First the bomb blasts in Sri Lanka with the subsequent refusal of the South Africans to play, and today the ball tampering controversy in England and Pakistan's refusal to play. And although both happened far away in completely different contexts, one can't help but think that when someone will write the history of the sport in a few years time, both incidents will be grouped under the chapter 'Racism'.

i'm not one of those who are quick to interpret any controversy as White v/s Coloured. But cricket's track record is too strong to be denied as proof. And invariably, inspite of having a Pakistani chief, the ICC seems to have a different set of rules for the White Gentleman.

Australia played the Ashes quite happily after the London train bombings. And if the Australian or the English team had actually tampered the ball, no umpire in the world would have so openly and brazenly penalised them without any explanation or proof. The South Africans complain about the 'dangerous' situation in SL, and the very same night party in a disco close to where the bombings happened. Everyone knows both Brett Lee and Muralitharan chuck the ball, but only one of them has his credibility questioned. Pakistan has a past history of ball tampering which is always taken as 'proof' against them, but when known sledger Glenn McGrath gets into an argument with a 'coloured' Ramnaresh Sarwan, it's the latter who gets banned for a few matches. Spinning tracks in India are an 'unfair advantage' while bouncy, pacy wickets in Australia are 'challenging playing conditions'. And there's much more which i cannot remember...

i do not particularly like the Pakistani cricket team, but i so respect what they did today. In this time and age, cricket's soul lies in the sub-continent; but in ther minds of the controlling body, it's still a White Man's Game.

Ok fine!!!...

2006-08-19T12:09:00.000-07:00

i can't believe i'm saying this, but still...

KANK WAS A DECENT MOVIE

(but now starts the fine print.. muhahahahahahhaahha...:
1) The trappings of a Karan Johar movie distract from what i feel is a good tight script.
2) Shahrukh Khan cannot act. Yet i sympathise with his character's attitude having been through many frustrating phases with similar reactions.
3) It's a little embarassing to watch Amitabh. But benefit of doubt. Maybe it's just my problem.
4) Why the contrived end?
5) Why can't such movies be based in India? Similar issues with Salaam Namaste as well. If you want to be bold, be bolder and set it in Mumbai, not in Manhattan.)

And before i start sounding like a film critic, i will stop.

Freedom...

2006-08-14T22:29:00.000-07:00

A day when i can't go to site because i might die in a bomb explosion in a bus.
A day when i can't watch a movie in a theatre because there just might be a human bomb there.
A day when i can't drive on the roads peacefully because the cops will stop me at every checkpoint.
A day when the PM of this country tells us to be aware of terrorist threats.
A day when air traffic is slowed down because of increased security threats.
A day when a simple car accident could start communal riots.
A day of sitting at home and saying 'Saare Jahan Se Accha'.

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

May next year's Independence Day be truly free of fear.

Speed post...

2006-08-13T07:38:00.000-07:00

Why does a bad song get stuck in my head for weeks? And why do bad songs get played so often on the radio that i start liking them?

Do people who go abroad to study n say they'll come back ever do?

Why is Iago (or Langda Tyagi) the 'ideal villain'? Is it because he does nothing evil himself, but inspires the evil in others?

Why is orkut so addictive?

Why do we derive pleasure from criticising others just to make ourselves feel less inferior?

Who would you consider a closer friend? Someone who's been your classmate for 10 years or someone you've never seen but just chatted online with for 5 years?

Do businesses actually earn any profits when they offer 'ek pe ek free'?

Why does passion get replaced by anger and frustration so often in life?

Where do i get the answers to these questions?

Touchy...

2006-08-07T09:04:00.000-07:00

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!
A psychologist who seems modern by her attire complains to the cops that some artist is showing porn under the guise of art! All this in South Mumbai!!!!
And i thought only the VHP and Bajrang Dal had a problem with it...
And i feel sorry for her patients.. especially the ones with sexual issues.....

In a particular 'Seinfeld' episode, Jerry's funny Catholic dentist converts to Judaism. Shocking. But what seems worse to Jerry is that he suddenly starts cracking Jewish jokes. When asked, he says, "I'm a JEW now. I'm allowed to make Jewish jokes. It's our sense of humour that has brought us through 2000 years of hardship... Ok sorry 4000..."

Maybe all artists should join the RSS...

Rain Rain Come Again...

2006-08-06T01:16:00.000-07:00

MHADA and the South-West Monsoon Winds bring to you,
For the First Time Ever In Mumbai,

LEARN SWIMMING AT HOME!!!!!
NO NEED FOR SWIMMING POOL, LIFEGUARDS ETC.

All you need is:
1) a MHADA constructed building
2) a room facing the southwest direction (for vaastu compliance)
3) rubber floats and swimming trunks

We take responsibility for making sure you get sufficient depth of water!
All in the comfort of your own home!!!
Hurry! Only 2 months for the monsoon to end!

We do not take responsibilty if you ceiling collapses and injures you. Depth of water may be subject to vagaries of monsoon.

Karan Johar...

2006-08-01T07:29:00.000-07:00

My favourite billboard is one that stands right outside my bedroom window. Very useful, especially when the computer misbehaves or the world wide wait gets longer. Today, it shows me a poster for Karan Johar's latest magnum opus, 'Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna'. Studded with the most saleable stars in Bollywood, it attempts (or so i've heard) to recreate 'Closer' but with an 'Indian' heart. 'Closer' portrays the extra-marital affair in the grey, vague territory it lies in. Is it about lust, longing, love or just revenge? And from KANK's trailers, i know it's a totally sappy Karan Johar melodrama about (i quote from the poster) 'A Love... That Broke All Relationships'. Sob Sob. Clap Clap. Good tagline.

i'm expecting a truly bad movie. For one, it has Shahrukh Khan spreading his arms out to violins in the background like he's done in 300 million scenes before this movie. It has Amitabh Bachchan getting credit as if he's the hero of the movie. Karan wants to be in 'Amit uncle's' good books. He gets to say lines like 'Love and death creep up when you least expect it.' And i'm sure there's a loooooong unneccessary role for him complete with dance sequence because 'he's soooo cute even at this age!!!' (puke) And it has the requisite Disco-with-Bhartiya-Dil song. And the slick promos with brown leaves floating all around. And foreign locations with all their sanitised glassiness. And the list goes on. And it won't matter if it's a bad movie. All the critics will shower their praises on him and then call and say 'When will you read my script?', YashRaj films will declare it a hit within a weekend. All theatres, all shows will be KANK KANK KANK...(sounds like a rooster with a stone stuck in his throat) Ugh.
Why can't he stop making movies when all of them look the same??

Oh, they're changing the poster now. Wow! It's Mallika Sherawat and Rahul Bose in a movie together!!!! Now i don't know whether to watch it or leave it...

End of an Era...

2006-07-30T05:02:00.000-07:00

Today, my computer monitor is going away. It served me for 6 years, through 3 major computer upgrades. It makes its way for a sleek 15" LCD screen which will take up less space on my already cramped computer table. Alternately increasing and reducing its brightness, it reminded me its time was up.
Now there will be a 'clean spot' the size of a regular monitor on my desk for some time.
RIP

Thought...

2006-07-28T09:01:00.000-07:00

Saw a weirdly interesting movie called 'Lake House' the other day. Initial impression based totally on the actors. Expected Keanu Reeves' blank, open-mouthed "I'm the One??" expression and Sandra Bullocks' "I'm the Southern city girl!!!" dialogue delivery. And also the standard Hollywood movie problems, trying to cater to the largest possible audience, screen time for the main actors, unneccessary plot twists, the sappiness of a romantic movie blah blah blah
But that is not why i'm writing this.
The movie was good. Yes. After a phase of 2 years where i saw everything from 'Along Came Polly' to 'Spiderman', i can say FINALLY i saw a decent English movie in a theatre which actually challenges me to think. Parallel universes that collapse and deform and separate and meet, all because of the need to be with someone. The weirdest part was something that someone does in the future changes the past. Now that was so un Hollywoodie. Actually quite a little Hollywoodie. These thought provoking movies seem to come from there quite often. i mean, The Matrix changed the way i think (KRVIA also did, but sorry, the Matrix came first)
So why do we get subjected to crap like 'The Hulk'? Or is it us unfortunate Third World Demographic that gets subjected to trite?

Fatitude...

2006-07-22T07:54:00.000-07:00

i used to eat a lot. And was blessed with Jughead metabolism. Throughout school and till last year, i was the scrawniest kid but could compete with the big guys in any eating competition.
Not anymore.
It was the generally nice Amritsar trip that started it all. The Punjabi air, lassi, butter chicken and parathas etc. Then Himachal which was freezing cold and made eating the general pastime. i come back and realise i've gained 4 kilos in 2 weeks. Which seemed ok back then. But since that fateful October, my Jughead-ity has been lost. With a truck tire and a pregnant paunch, i am embarassed to say i've joined the fat brigade...
So i have decided to reduce my food intake. Not diet. Which means, when i feel like eating 3 samosas dripping with oil, i will eat only 2. And my fatness meter is my fellow classmates. The resistance that a finger prod to the stomach brings is the measure of fatness. Less the resistance, more the fat. And i hope i can squeeze a few minutes of jogging in a day.
But its damn surprising to me how much a few extra kilos can change one's self image. Now i'm (trying to) constantly suck my stomach in, sitting in positions that do not reveal my girth.
This seems a good test for my will power. How long will it be before i go for that desired extra slice of pizza? And i'm sure the peanuts i'm munching on are doing something. Maybe the football i played last afternoon will count...
i need to eat. And i should be allowed to eat. Without being prodded.

Censorship...

2006-07-18T07:55:00.000-07:00

Seems like George Bush has found new friends.

All in the Indian government. i can't believe they've blocked blogspot.com. From what i hear, its not a mistake.

After 7/11, the government does not increase security at railway stations. It does not ban SIMI, the Shiv Sena and like-minded organisations. It does not bother to do anything serious. But blocking a few websites will make sure that "the terrorist threat is tackled". This is the response to a tragedy that killed 200 people? We all know which country harbours these terrorists. Hell, we even know where their camps are. But trying to ban "bloodspot.com" and ending up banning "blogspot.com" tells me three things:
1) The government does not care who dies, how they die and how many die as long as it does not affect the status quo.
2) They can't spell, read or write properly.
3) They don't have a spine.

C'mon government censors. We are not China. That's what makes our development such a spectacle. We are entitled to our free speech. And if the blocking happened really because of a typo, then i further lose my respect for all of you. Arjun Singh, maybe this should get you to ensure free and fair primary education for all.

The Day After...

2006-07-12T03:06:00.000-07:00

Traffic seems ok.
Rail services running just a little late.
Attendance in offices seemingly normal.
Life is back on track.
A day after 200 people die in 7 bomb blasts along the lifeline of the city.
Sometimes, i wonder.
Is it the never say die spirit of the city?
Is it the awareness that death may strike as and when it pleases?
Is it the hopelessness of living in a city that kills you every day little by little?

Don't get me wrong. i love this city.
But sometimes, i wonder about its "spirit".
Maybe the spirit is a certain amount of heartlessness.
Maybe we have all become emotionally dead.
Maybe that's why when a disaster happens, we do such a good job.
Floods, bombs, riots. We've seen them all. And we don't bat an eyelid.
No adverse reactions to seeing mangled bodies popping out of train compartments.
Years of getting pushed around in trains and buses. Coming back to cramped matchboxes called 'home'. Seeing unimaginable misery near every slum pocket.
Leaves no space for 'emotion'. Otherwise we would all be insane by now.

Salaam Mumbai. You have held your nerve. You have been brave. But there's nothing wrong with mourning.

11/7

2006-07-11T08:57:00.000-07:00

NEVER SAY DIE.

Tiger Tiger Burning Bright...

2006-07-09T02:20:00.000-07:00

The Shiv Sena has never ceased to amaze me for it's intelligence. But today it just left me awestruck. The Thackerays know they have no clout left, not in Mumbai, not in the rest of Maharashtra. So they pick the perfect day to make a "show of strength". Who leaves their homes before 6 p.m. on a Sunday? Perfect time to call a bandh. No one will be on the streets and the Shiv Sena can claim it was successful (whatever that means). In fact, i wonder if even the "desecration" was real. And if it was, i doubt anyone but the Sena has the balls to do it. And as i see traffic on the roads but the news showing images of a burning bus, i can't believe Uddhav Thackeray is claiming a victory as hollow as the Shiv Sena's ideals. The Tiger is dead.

Big City Blues...

2006-07-06T09:46:00.000-07:00

After a long day at Bhayander going from house to house asking the same 15 questions while dodging mad rickshaws and unpredictable group members, i have a list! (David Letterman style!!!)

YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN A BIG CITY WHEN...
10) You can't hear the voices in your head thanks to the traffic
9) Your idea of relaxation is Himesh Reshammiya from a rickshaw's torn speakers
8) You're in an empty train you purposely hit the door as you get off, just because you miss the mind boggling rush
7) You talk to people, they're also talking on their cell phones and listening to their music players
6) The closest you came to having a pet was the crow that ate your leftovers every day
5) You have school friends, junior college friends, college friends, building friends, football friends, classes friends, online friends, friends of friends...
4) A black oily liquid is what is left of the sea.
3) When you ring a doorbell, you are assumed to be a salesman unless you show some i.d.
2) The longest conversation of the day were the insults you shouted at the local pervert

And
1) Reading this post makes you say "Hey! That happened to me!" atleast thrice

Mee Mumbaikar...

2006-07-04T07:39:00.000-07:00

Wow. Talk about paranoia.

"Andheri is under water!"
- Aaj Tak reporter standing in 3 inches of water

"Is Mumbai sinking?"
-Poll question on CNN-IBN

And frantic calls from friends and relatives living outside Mumbai who assume one of the following:
1) Mumbai constitutes of 2 suburbs
2) All the news channels are honest

"We heard Dadar had neck high water. You live close by right?"
Yes. Dadar is 40 mins away by road. Unless the rain gets stuck at Mahim causeway like all cars do, it's quite close.

"Have you got emergency equipment ready?"
Yes. We have a complicated emergency response system. Step One is not picking up the phone. Especially the outstation phone calls.

Ok sorry. It's nice to know they care. But as i look out of my window and see people wading in waist deep water, the brand new car about to become a malfunctioning submarine and notice that water is in the wrong places (and not in the taps) and reports of people receiving electric shocks in the area...
i can't help but think i'VE BEEN THROUGH WORSE!!!

i guess that's what makes me a true blue Mumbaikar...

Orkut...

2006-07-01T00:38:00.000-07:00

Got invited to be member of orkut and realised what the madness was about. "I scrapped you yesterday you didn't see or wot?" i'm sure we've all heard sentences like this and more. And it's damn popular. And user-friendly. And its also really funny to watch Paul with a parrot on his forearm in his display pic. He looks like one of those Hollywood environmentalists...
But let's get down to the facts. Orkut is extremely inefficient. If i have to tell someone something, i have to send a scrap which may or may not be read. And it's not like email which shows 'You've got mail' everytime you get one. And its not as urgent as any Messenger. So it's not mail, it's not messaging, it's not an SMS... wow! i thot if you have these three you don't need anything else to be in contact with someone... but NO! orkut has come to the rescue....
What is it about Orkut that people like so much? Is it the exclusivity? Knowing that you've been "invited" to join "a global community of like-minded individuals"? The number of scraps you get that always feature next to your name? "Oh look what a loser... he/she has just 59012 scraps compared to my 75123." And what about the utopian idea of the World Wide Web; the one that professes no boundaries and no popularity contests?
And there's more.... but i have to reply to someone's scrap about my photo. And also add someone to my list. And laugh again at Paul's display pic.
(is the parrot called Polly?)

Long Time No See...

2006-06-21T08:26:00.000-07:00

Went to college after a month and 13 days. Longest ive been away from there since 1st year. Sounds kinda sad and geeky i know. And i missed the large, long and unending studios, the stuffy suffocated AV room, the half-seat half-retaining wall next to the lawn, the stilt area, the waste space where we play football. But not the people. The same ones who i felt like running away from at the end of last year and thought a month and a half at an office where i wouldn't be in contact with any of them would help. Not all of them obviously. But the number's large enough to generalise. i don't know what has tired me about them. Maybe it's the pointless objections to my opinions which my headstrong and stubborn head cannot take. Maybe it is the knowledge of the evil and malicious in each of them, soaked over the last 3 years. For some, the hard core selfishness that seems to rule every aspect of their lives. Or simply, its all in my imagination. Every little incident, every carefree word, every act of indifference. It has all built up and created monsters in my head. Monsters who i will smile at everyday. Monsters who i will live with day and night as we slog over the next day's presentation. Monsters who i don't know are imagined or real. Or maybe its me. i am the Monster.

Weekdays...

2006-06-19T23:17:00.000-07:00

It feels damn odd to do nothing on a weekday. Now that i have 4 days off from college. (thank you Paul for the best gift ever.. sob sob... if you didn't notice the sarcasm then you may take it as a genuine thank you) It's too little time to do anything big and too much time to do anything useful. And to add to my general state of laziness, there's no water in the house thanks to MMRDA who break the main water pipe everytime they're in the mood for some road exapansion. Anyways, as ive been making so many lists in the last few days i thought i'll make one more...
...naah maybe not...
lazing around seems fine for now.....
yawn

Gradation...

2006-06-17T07:26:00.000-07:00

The feminists of the world (and women living in some suburbs of Mumbai) will kill me for saying this but it seems the number of babes per square metre of pavement reduces as one travels from Bandra to Juhu...

Cup of Woes...

2006-06-13T07:33:00.001-07:00

Its Football World Cup Time!! Or for some people, time to show they're 'in with the thang!' So whether they know the difference between a football and a footsie, 'my 2 cents shall be broadcasted'. Not that i'm some big football expert but still....

TOP 5 FOOTBALL WC GAFFES (and why they are wrong):

5) 'I love Brazil. I think they have the best defense.' - Some female celebrity in Bombay Times
(Correct me if i'm wrong but i think they're known more for their attack line. And teams like Italy and England must've felt very bad.)

4) 'Rio Ferdinand has the best striker's instinct I've ever seen' - Nephew who was co-incidentally a defender in school football team
(Yes, he's one of the better defenders in the world and yes he's scored quite a few goals but i think that's stretching it too far.)

3) 'India came damn close to qualifying this year.' - Relative trying to start a conversation
(Strange. God knows where he got that from. Anyways, i don't think we came close..... even by a mile)

2) 'Roy Keane and Robbie Keane will make sure Croatia win the World Cup' - cricket crazy school mate
(Both play for Ireland. And Ireland hasn't even qualified. Croatia ended up 3rd in 1998 and i think this year they aren't very strong contenders.)

BUT this one is the clincher. Even more so cos it happened on live TV and millions heard it.

1) 'England won by a single home run over Portugal thanks to His Royal Highness Daniel Beckingham' - American baseball commentator forced to present 'soccer' show.
(As everyone must've guessed, he's off the show now. And if you're still wondering why, its David Beckham. And he's not even related to the Queen. And its called a goal. And call it football, not soccer. Just like table tennis is table tennis, not ice hockey.)

Enjoy! And may the best team win!

Firsts...

2006-06-08T08:36:00.000-07:00

i GOT MY FIRST PAYCHEQUE TODAY!!!
its a different feeling altogether gettin a cheque. its like ur officially a paid member of society or sumthn... ive gotten paid for work done earlier but in cash and trust me it feels so much better this time!!!

sorry bad pic...

Grey...

2006-06-04T05:54:00.000-07:00

Today as i drove along the recently-widened road full of vehicles lined with buildings in front of my house, i thought for a second that i was living in some Corbusian dream-city. Except for the dug-up footpaths with pipes sticking out, the dead shrubs on the divider and ugly MHADA buildings replacing his modernist cubes...

Rain Rain Come Again...

2006-06-01T07:19:00.000-07:00

i possess the greatest predictor of monsoons known to humans. My respiratory system. Forget the met department, the shedding gulmohar trees, the pied-crested cuckoo etc. A day before the monsoon hits Bombay, i get atleast a cough and cold. Depending on the severity of the first rains, this could be as mild a barely-there case of sniffles. So you can imagine what must have happened this time... i got viral fever which necessitated two days of bed rest. And lo and behold, the monsoon starts 2 days before the met departments predictions.

5 THINGS NOT TO LOOK FORWARD TO THIS MONSOON:
1) Muck
2) Water logging
3) Huge, massive cyclone style 'cloudbursts'
4) Smelly wet socks
5) Stalled cars

5 THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO THIS MONSOON:
1) Holidays due to water logging
2) Pakodas and chai
3) Raincoats and windcheaters in all possible colours
4) Getting soaked in a drizzle
5) Lush green leaves on trees

Happy Monsooning!!

Once Again...

2006-05-29T11:52:00.000-07:00

Its been seventeen days since the doctors at AIIMS have been on strike. And still no favourable response from the government. Has democracy been reduced to electoral politics? A game of monopoly. The more number of castes one controls, the more 'secular' or the more 'democratic' one is. Here is a minister hell-bent on fucking up the future of the country and all the prime minister can do is keep quiet and pray the matter boils over and once theres no hope of that happening, issue hollow statements which stink of government apathy. While thousands of students all over the country protest. It doesn't make a difference to most of the protestors whether reservation is increased or not. All of them are halfway down their graduation and if they wished not to care, it wouldn't have affected them. But it hurts when one sees someone (doesn't matter what caste) get the much desired seat in a prestigious college when that person doesn't deserve it. It hurts to see someone drive up in a Honda City and take the Rs. 10 SC/ST reserved quota admission form. It hurts to see someone with a callous attitude and a carefree life get ahead of you just because that person was born to a 'disadvantaged' family.

www.youth4equality.org. Support the revolution.

New old faces...

2006-05-26T09:48:00.000-07:00

Travelling back from work in Bandra for the last three weeks has resulted in a recognisable mass of people all of whom wait for that god-forsaken 222 to come on time for atleast once in its warranty period...

1) Girl who always and without fail fiddles with tangled mess of earphones
2) Quiet, nose digging guy who seems to be waiting for someone
3) Cranky old man who always fights with conductor for change
4) Polite guy who always asks in shuddh hindi whether the bus has come
5) Pav aunty with rosary in her hands all the time
6) Bandra chicks who giggle all the time. One of them has 4 piercings in her left ear
7) Girl with laptop who gets off at Gagandeep
8) Loud cell phone user guy with cool Omega watch.

If any of you guys read this and use the same bus stop as i do (im sure by now you would know if you do) then say hi to me on Monday.

Evil Plans...

2006-05-23T08:06:00.000-07:00

Saw an article in the paper the other day which said sharing gossip helps in building better bonds of friendship. Hmmm....
A few weeks ago, a few friends and i decided to make use of the little information we have and minute observations we make about other people in the class and put them on cyberspace as a blog. Just for fun and maybe as a reminder of what we were like and what we did in college. Of course no names. And lots of innuendo. And a promise that we won't tell anyone about this and to let people find out on their own. Then somewhere down the line, we all decided not to. Maybe certain people's comments to certain stuff written about them on someone else's blog made us realise people were touchy after all, however much they may try to create an image of the opposite. Maybe we were afraid it might turn out to be malicious. Or even the fact that we're all too lazy too indulge in something like that....
But the question is, how do we decide what gossip is? ive realised that invariably when one talks about another person, it ends up being 'oh i heard that this person...' or 'this person is so (fill with adjective)...' which might get construed as 'gossip'. But most of it is harmless, it makes no difference to anyone in the world and no attitudes or perceptions of people are changed.
So does that mean the minute it changes people's perceptions of someone, it becomes gossip? Or when you make up stuff based on little fact and lots of imagination? i know people who've become the world's worst enemies just cos someone had a bad experience with them and decided to tell everyone within earshot about it. Or the other way round, where someone is hated by everyone just cos that person bitches about everyone. Maybe the news report ain't all that right.
Where does one draw the line?? Could someone temme fast cos i have this juicy bit of...

Fall from grace...

2006-05-21T02:02:00.000-07:00

i feel so sorry for one Sean Preston. Poor guy. Must be a pain (literally) having a mom like Britney Spears. First there's the intense media scrutiny. Then theres the pain of having a dad who prefers strippers to him on his lap. And if that wasn't enough, he gets dropped as often as a badly-performing stock. First he fell off his high chair and fractured his skull. Now his mom drops him while trying to save her bottle of Pepsi (or whatever she's paid to endorse). Thanks to her personal bodyguard, he avoided major injury. Wearing platform heels and jeans that would invariably come under those heels may not be bad mothering but it surely points to dumb mothering. One glance at her and 'oops I did it again' doesn't seem misplaced. Maybe globe-trotting, orphan (??)-rescuing, general Hollywood do-gooder and UNICEF ambassador Angelina Jolie has place in her house for another child?

Quota wars...

2006-05-15T08:48:00.000-07:00

Before i begin my angry rant, what is the point of designating Azad Maidan as a 'space for demonstration'? For 3 days when doctors were demonstrating in the so called protest area, no one noticed. Now when they got close to politicians' residences and the governor's residence, the police lathi charge them. What is the point of a protest when the protestor cannot make the protestee aware of his/her demands?? (completely off the topic, Rahul Gore and Rajiv Thakkar, also the two university viva jurors, with all due respect, this is why i did what i did for Amritsar A.D. A large open space does not work as a protest space.)

Now comes the fun part. i hate cops. i make no bones about it. They're corrupt. They pick on innocent couples, bikers and any woman who's on the street at night. They fail to do their job well. They do not give a rat's ass about helping anyone else but themselves. Even something as simple as passport verification is bungled up. Elephants in a zoo are in better shape than all the pan chewing, obese, orthodox men in khaki. But today, the Mumbai police crossed all limits.

The images on TV are horrendous. i'm sure by now all of India has seen them. What pisses me off the most is the balls of the Mumbai Police Commisioner. He has the guts to come on TV and say, 'They shouldn't have demonstrated.' SHOULDN'T HAVE DEMONSTRATED?? i can point atleast a hundred similarities between today's video footage and that taken in the 1930s when Gandhi led the country. What freedom have we achieved when a valid point is made repeatedly but one pig headed politician with one eye on the votebank and both his legs dangling precariously over his grave refuses to consider the ramifications of his decision? The reason for the lathi charge is that the students came out of the 'designated demonstration area.' 3 days of demonstration in the designated area invited a small mention on page 5 of the major newspapers. What is the point of the demonstration then? Have politicians become so independent of the citizens that an opinion is accepted merely as token?

And why does Manmohan Singh, the architect of India's economic liberalisation, not speak up? Oh sorry. His voice is the voice of the new Mother India. One who is simply trying hard to ensure her children's future. Nothing should come in the way. Not even the lives of millions of youth.

And why do these things affect me? If you are asking that question, switch on your TV. And tell me if you don't feel a thing...

Standing By...

2006-05-10T11:37:00.000-07:00

The other day i was walking along one of Bandra's busy lanes when i see a speeding car (a sedan i.e. ikon, esteem, siena type cars), probably dark blue or black in colour (it was night time, so couldn't see much). As it whizzed by, i heard a loud screech and by the time i looked behind, a man was flying through the air. The impact with the car must have AT LEAST broken his leg. In addition he flipped three times in the air. He must have been thrown a good 10 feet off the ground. i was atleast a hundred feet away but i could hear the thump as he fell. And what does the car driver do? He/she simply drove away as fast as he/she got there. i regret not helping the injured man. i regret not being able to note down the car number. i regret walking away after the initial 2 seconds of shock. This happened on the 5th of May at around 8.00 p.m. near Noodle Bar in Bandra and it took me more than 5 days to write about it which again i regret. i scanned the papers the next day and there was nothing. Maybe if a celebrity was involved, it would have made news. The guy who got hit may be in hospital or at home or may even be dead cos it would be very easy for his head to hit the kerb of the pavement after getting thrown in the air. i know this may be of no use but just once i want the driver of the dark-colored sedan to know that he should atleast feel guilty if he isn't already. Atleast more guilty than i am feeling right now.

Arrival...

2006-05-09T09:11:00.000-07:00

Himesh Reshammiya. His reshami nasal voice has left the country in a tizzy. It didn't strike me till a few days ago exactly how popular he was until i noticed a Subhash Ghai movie ad having the words 'Music: Himesh Reshammiya' larger than the title of the movie itself. But yesterday, i was convinced the self-confessed 'rock star' was bigger than anything in the world right now. Here's a list of what was playing around 8.25 pm on the 5 major radio stations in Mumbai:
1) Radiocity: Zara jhoom jhoom (sung by h.r.)
2) Go: A-a-ashiqui mein tere (sung by h.r.)
3) Red: Naam hai tera (sung by h.r.)
4) Mirchi: All day all night (sung by h.r.)
5) Rainbow: Aashiq Banaya Aapne (sung by h.r.)

At one point of time, all these songs were playin at the same time.
i am sure MTV and Channel V must be having some h.r. song playing at 8.25 p.m.

Has he arrived or what!!!

Practise what you preach...

2006-05-06T10:03:00.001-07:00

Apparently,
All builders compromise on quality.
All builders do not realise the importance of good lighting.
All builders want is to earn money without putting much effort.
All builders will give you a suffocated, congested space if it means they save one extra rupee.

All architects know ergonomic requirements like the back of their hands.
All architects talk about comfortable work spaces.
All architects talk about light as an inspiration, light as an expression of space.
All architects talk about ventilation as an essential component of the experience of space.
All architects talk about spaces inspiring one to work on even the most mundane tasks.

Then why do most architectural offices resemble sweatshops?

In Anticipation...

2006-05-05T10:55:00.000-07:00

This vacation, i promise to do the following:
1) Jog every morning. Running out of breath after running up the stairs has set alarm bells ringing
2) Read two good books atleast. Every vacation the short trip to the book store seems looong. This time its even shorter with Crossword opening practically next door.
3) Watch lesser TV. Eats into time for #1 and #2. Also might be contributing to increase in power of glasses.
4) Play more sports. Haven't played much whole of last year.
5) Contact old friends. Haven't heard from them for most of last year.
6) Clean my desk. Recently, i found a tracing from 1st year. Shocking, considering 2 month old models do not make it to the vivas.
7) Search for better computer upgrades. And install new devices, some waiting for almost 6 months to be installed. And figure out what to do with aging monitor.
8) Fix drafting table. Won't need it much next year, but repair might increase resale value.
9) Sleep 8 hours a day. Actually make that 10 hours, to catch up on lost hours.
10) Enable World Peace. Arrange meetings between all warring parties and give them a 24-hour deadline to fix things done wrong. Another 24 hours to sign 999-year binding contracts with no escape clauses.... (now you know how serious i am about this list)

Looks like it's gonna be #3 and #9 all over again this summer too. Happy Holidays!

RIP Pramod Mahajan

Blasts from the Past...

2006-04-21T11:17:00.000-07:00

Finally saw the 'Ek chidiya, anek chidiya' video downloaded atleast a month back. And all the images still as fresh as they were in the good old days when DD was the only channel to watch. The orange-with-yellow border mangoes (which for some inexplicable reason i really craved), the holier-than-thou sister, the blinking sun and moon, the birds pecking at grains hip-hop style... And yet, i don't remember ever liking it so much. In fact, i clearly remember a time when i used to get away from the TV when this film came on. Boredom? Overkill perhaps?

Go 92.5 FM has become full hindi now and that's a big disappointment for lovers of all kinds of music like me. They played a song the other day which seemed strangely familiar and the words came back to me. It was from the movie 'Ek Duje ke Liye' and has lyrics consisting only of Bollywood movie titles. 'Mere Jeevan Saathi... Pyaar kiye jaa... Jawaani Deewani... Khoobsurat Ziddi Padosan Satyam Shivam Sundaram'. And my mom reminds me i HATED this song. Then why does it sound so nice now? Changed sense of humour? Maturity perhaps?

Or maybe simply, nostalgia. The heady feeling of the past being so much better that the haze makes you forget that it really wasn't so good. The lesser you remember, the more lucid the imagination.

Travel...

2006-04-19T09:41:00.000-07:00

This city's too long. After a week of JJ visitations for the exams, the 25 or so km between Andheri and CST seem so loong. Useful though. Travelling takes atleast 45 minutes by train and in that much time one could finish the whole Landscape syllabus atleast once. Wait, i'm digressing. The point is that how nice would it have been (considering other factors remaining the same) if the Brits had made Bombay Fort at Bandra. A more centrally located CBD would have solved half the city's traffic and most of the housing issues. Maybe JJ would've been near Sion hospital. Or Bandstand would've been Marine Drive. New Bombay would've been more viable as a satellite city, with a single track connecting this CBD to all those CBDs. Richie-rich Peddar road would've been Khar, Dadar would've been Andheri. The south would've been one large residential area (i'm imagining) with Hafeez-style skyscrapers et al. Townies would be 'burbies and 'burbies would be townies... Oh... and i would've been living in Borivili. And still taken 45 minutes by train to get to Bandra.
Not such a big difference, is it?

P.S. Can someone tell me why, in a city surrounded by water, is Marine Drive the only seaside promenade worth writing home about??