CSI Theatre of Performing Arts...

Waiting at the International Airport to pick people up is like watching hundreds of performances at one shot.

First of all, is the audience. Arranged in two tiers, the cheap 'seats' are outside the building and the 'balcony section' is inside, where you pay to enter. Already the audience is waiting for their rockstars with signs saying 'Mr. Adam Smith, Welcome to India' or 'Fertiliser industry welcomes delegates'. The excitement mounts as the flight information indicator changes frmo 'Scheduled' to 'Arrived' and reaches a crescendo when the Opening Act (read: the airline crew, who get first preference to leave) makes its appearance.

Then come the stars of the show. They are watched at every point along the looooong corridor that has bouncers standing along the edges. They have to make sure they meet the expectations of their waiting audience. The firangs have to look 'desified' enough, the desis have to look firang enough. Let's face it, who'll give bhaav to a desi without a pony or not dressed in a tracksuit?(that's funny, isn't it? Most of us leave in shirts and corduroys and return in banians and shorts. Is is THAT expensive?) Or for that matter, a firang without the mandatory tilak or Goa shirt?

The waiting audience is also performing. People who've spoken in Hindi or Marathi or Tamil or any of the hundreds of native tongues all their lives, suddenly acquire a new comfort with English when they enter the waiting lounge. And a twang to boot. But the air inside the waiting area is not firangified enought, so mentions of 'snakes and cheaps' slip through amongst the 'oh yeah the flight is naat on ske-dool'.

The show begins. Our country bumpkins turned rockstars acquire a new coolness to them. Compulsory mineral water bottle in hand, (after drinking our sludge for 25 years that too) they wear their sunglasses (at 3 in the morning) and emerge at the end of the exit corridor with their trolleys and waist pouches. The crowd goes into a frenzy. Camera phones click, ring tones start getting louder, conversations become hypersonic. And the waving! Oh who could forget those! The two carloads of people who've come to receive the rockstar start a mexican wave. (And why shouldn't they? What else could be the purpose of 15 people coming to receive one person) The rockstar responds with a wave thats strangely cold (Were they moonlighting as President Bush's waving body double?) and as he/she approaches the by-now-wild fans, he/she lets out a 'Hey wazzaa?' (Yes, your grandmother understands what you say. The universal language of showing attitude.) Then the point towards the exit, and all the groupies run off behind their rockstar.

But all is not hunky dory for our rockstars. Sometimes, they get stuck in customs and baggage loading. Or sometimes, CSI airport just messes with them. Just for fun. Really.

Thank God for CSI airport people. Without them, our rockstars would have had heads the size of watermelons!

Moving On...

This Indo-Pak cricket series has been devoid of all the passions that usually accompany it. One could say, considering the frequency with which these teams play each other nowadays, it has become less and less of an entertainer. But Indo-Pak cricket has more than just cricket, hasn't it?
i think the rivalry was at its peak in the '80s when, ironically, both teams played each other as often as they do now. Sharjah was the battleground then, and anyone even remotely interested in the game knows about Javed Miandad's last ball six in 1986. The best team of the time was the West Indies, but no one seemed to care how we fared with them. As long as we beat Pakistan. Somehow the yardstick has changed and Australia is the team we have to beat, come what may. Some see the Pakistan series as a warm-up before the Australia tour! Have our focuses changed?
i think it's got to do with the fact that, as a nation, we aren't competing with Pakistan anymore. The world sees us as India, not as the 1st part of a hyphenation that linked us with Pakistan since 1947. We've left Pakistan behind in most economic indicators, and also most political ones. A battle on the cricket pitch in the 80's seemed almost allegorical to the battle for political and economic one-upmanship the two countries were involved in. Not so much anymore. If China played cricket (sorry... good cricket), the China tour of 2007 would have been the highlight of the cricket season. We've clearly moved on.