Expressing unwanted opinions...

i realised what people mean when they say they get 'intimidated' by other people's opinions. After attending a two-day conference on the emergence of a new urbanism with all kinds of anthropologists, historians, social scientists and deep-thinking architects, every opinion of mine gets checked and double-checked in my mind, for every possible mis-pronounced word and words with alternate meanings. While i construct the sentence, lunch/tea is called, and that's the end of that. And what makes it worse is the 'I'm drawing from the work of XYZ when I say....' and 'I think it was XYZ and I who discussed this a few days ago...' What makes academicians talk to just each other in a crowd of 150? Or what's the obsession with the metaphor and the romanticism rather than the actual comparison? And the almost complete submission to leftist politics?

But the point of this post is not to complain about feeling left out of what was obviously a gathering of smarter people, rather archive for myself some opinions. Maybe they'll change over the years or even weeks.

One is obviously regarding the changing morphology of the city. Although physically the city is undergoing a change in image, i would think the older networks have still remained largely intact, although some have been pushed underground or into the background. All the uproar of the mall being the temple of the modern city is probably unfounded. Now i know i'll be killed for this comparison, but i feel malls to a large extent are what the mills were to the 60's. Both are simply the signifiers of the prevalent economic system, not necessarily being the main contributers to it. Lots of data indicates that mills actually handled a small part of the whole textile process, a lot of it being outsourced to smaller towns and smaller set ups since the 1920s. Malls are following a similar (maybe even more insignificant) process, serving as merely marketing tools. Most shops (except the so called marquee ones) don't break even, but the exposure to a ravenously consumeristic middle class helps other outlets of the same 'brand' located in the traditional shopping areas to get some kind of brand recognition. Compare with M.G. Road in Bangalore with a similar trend of image-making outlets, while their factory outlets end up finishing the sale.

The next one is about new methods of entrepreneurship in the city. Now the problem with talking about this is sometimes we totally fall short of words. Traditional terminology, most of emerging out of a modernist urge to clean up and simplify, has simply not kept pace with development of these new forms of space. Take a simple land use classification. How do you define a space that is an industry from 7 to 7 and becomes residential for the remaining part of the day? Or the space under a staircase which has a tailoring establishment, with the workers living in it? Or for that matter a rickshaw, for whom two pictures of Kareena Kapoor on the side panels makes it home? We talk about emerging urbanisms and emerging typologies, but no emerging terminology. And this is not just about wanting to come up with a hep new word or two. Classifying or defining wrongly or incompletely totally restricts one's imagination of the space. Putting every space into one of 3 separate boxes is simply being slow to accept new trends. Maybe looser definitions might help?

And if someone wonders why i couldn't say all this 2 days ago, i have no one to blame except myself and maybe one person who's name begins with So and ends with jamin, who made it perfectly clear, even without knowing i exist, how unread and gawaar i was. May your brain's memory cells be transplanted into mine.

In the news today...

Hot and sexy Himess-bhai is out with his own line of casuals (also, i hope, soon: nasal drops and razor blades) and making a stand for lardful people the world over by posing with his innumerable tyres poking out of what seems to be a very loose jacket. Hepy new year to him...

In the middle of one of Khar's bylanes are some tin patris with a board saying 'MMRDA - Bare with us for a better tomorrow'. So far, the road hasn't been hammered out of shape. Vehicles dutifully going slow near the sign actually hammer their heads after seeing MMRDA's new method of irritation.

Two AD Singhs slugging it out for their brand name (yes! that's what one of them calls his name!!!) in page 3. One of them (the 25-yr old sardar) just maybe a classmate of my brother's. Are you the same Amit Duggal who was called 'Dug-dug-dug-dug-Duggallllll-Dugallllllllllll' in school?? Can that be your 'brand name' now?

South Africa's cricket team has now officially decided to call themselves 'India B'. If the uproar over a single defeat and 'aaj hero, kal zero' treatment at home wasn't enough, the inability to play pace bowling broke the last straw on the camel's back.

'I See You' now graces my favourite billboard, after Sanober and her thunder thighs held sway for a few weeks following 'Don's one-month reign up there.

To RGV: Enough with the Mumbai underworld already!!!

Myths and sundry things

It always perplexes (wow, that's a tongue twister! and also rhymes with multiplexes... sorry im digressing) me to see the amount of time we decide to see the same story countless times without any twists in it. How many times do i want to see a Ramayana with the same emphasis on how perfect Ram was and how he was dealt with so badly?
That's why it was a little surprising for me to see a serial called 'Ravan' yesterday on T.V. and what absolutely shocked me was the fact that Ravan was NORMAL. He didn't interject his sentences with 'Muhahahahahhahaha'. He talked sensibly all the time. He didn't plan to loot, pillage or rape anything. Best of all, he tells someone he's gonna get screwed because his dad messed up with the gods. Imagine the Ravan of lore doing that!
i am reminded of Amita Kanekar telling us in 3rd year that the Mahabharata had 13 versions, one of them having the Pandavas as the bad guys and the Kauravas the good ones. Which might explain why i was such a confused child regarding the Mahabharata. Yudi loved to gamble, Arjun was a transsexual/crossdresser, Bhima was a cheater in battle and Krishna was the Emraan Hashmi of his times of all. And Duryodhana, whose biggest crime seemed to be wanting to be king, was the bad guy. Go figure.
Every few days the Bible is re-interpreted and newer additions made to it, Shakespeare's plays are adapted to the Mumbai underworld or the Hindi heartland, but rarely do i see a re-telling of our myths. i wanna see a story or play where Ravan and Sita elope to save Sita from a bad marriage. i don't think it's too tough to do, is it? Oh wait, the V.H.P. may be reading this....

Power...

This week i was part of a workshop in college in which a classmate and i were assigned to be teaching assistants, and due to certain unavoidable circumstances ended up running it. And i don't wanna run anything anymore.

i don't want people to stop talking to me cos i didn't cheat on their attendance

i don't want to lose years of friendship over a difference of opinion

i don't want to feel responsible for every second someone is behind schedule

i don't want to yell at people cos im getting panicky

i don't think i can handle power

That's all.

Slumming it Out...

Various documents remind me that as Indians, we have no right to land. We are simply caretakers of land for the government to claim when they arbitrarily choose to. Atleast in all of this, they could be a little honest.
Dharavi has opened my middle class, closeted eyes to a whole new world of wheeling-dealing. Claims are made of being the authority on the area by everyone. Some of whom we are against, some we work with. The ones we are against have engaged in fudging records and statistics so much that in the eventual rehabilitation, 40% of those who need to be rehoused will be left without any means of shelter. Which means on one hand we'll see multi storeyed SRA apartments, and on the other hand hundreds of shanties refusing to move. And you and i, the privileged few of this country will say, 'See these shameless slum dwellers. Even after constructing so many buildings for them, they still choose to live in those jhopadpattis.' The ones who we are working with sell dreams to these slum dwellers of living in SRA apartments. After months of effort (and don't forget money) spent by these slumdwellers in trying to get the dream in motion, when the dream gets caught up in red tape, they say 'Look at these shameless slum dwellers. We did so much for them and they show no energy, and now they complain that nothing is happening.'

So what is worse. Selling dreams or selling livelihoods?

Hmm...

The shirt joins in the celebrations too...
Post #96.. getting close to a century!

Chain Reactions...

i am now convinced that riots are organised and orchestrated to the point of planning the 'outraging' event as well. i did not hear of any statue getting desecrated or even touched in the few days before the riots started. Nor has any news channel shown the body of the dead 23 yr old Dalit, but hours of screen time for, presumably, his weeping mother. And if it is such a 'spontaneous' reaction, then why appeal to the leaders of the Dalit parties to stop the rioting?

Rioting obviously is not merely a reaction to an incident, but tries to extract it's pound of flesh as well. Here, the 'pound of flesh' is ludicrous. A holiday on December 6th? What for? So that an already ineffectual government gets an extra day to doze off? Atleast demand something better, like reservations or something. Or is the Dalit community's self-respect at such a low, even after 60 years of pampering, that a holiday in the name of a dead leader will make them feel better???
But amidst all the rioting and ransacking and looting, it was nice to hear that there were no innocent lives lost. The only ones dead are some rioters. Good for them.

The Thesis Blog is up and running
http://the-thesis-blog.blogspot.com

Poster of 'Huballi'.. notice the larger than life worm's eye view

My funky green Goa shirt

Another movie poster.. notice Rajkumar on the top left hand corner "blessing" the movie.

Rickshaw driver's licence

The old, the new and the unchanged


Vijay Mallya's contribution to the world of architecture. Very art deco.. or a shrunken copy of Empire State building

Alien...

3 weeks in an alien land. Actually, three alien lands.

First, Bangalore/Bengalooru/I.T. City. Although my dad's from Karnataka, i
don't know one sentence of Kannada except saying 'Kannada Barudilla' and
counting upto ten, that one courtesy of some Kannada comedy seen on TV ten years ago. Made it interesting to talk to rickshaw drivers, especially when Abhimanyu pointed out road names on the Eicher map to a confused one. But by the end of the trip learnt one cool phrase thanks to N.C. Rao: Mella Yenta!!!! And some useful ones like Sullimagga.. used only for errant rickshaws.
The three-in-one city is damn weird. It supposedly runs on IT but shuts at 11 (even nightclubs!!!). Rickshaws have sexy electronic meters and highly visible driver's licences but charge at their drivers' whims. Lots of green spaces but 'Keep off the grass' signs. And a flyover with a traffic signal at the top (talk about mistakes...).
The identity crisis in the city (and the state is large) is apparent at every turn. Cox Town and Fraser Town are neighbours with Basavanagudi and Koramangalam. The lack of any famous home grown Kannada heroes and heroines leads to film stars (even minor ones) elevated to god-like status. And now Bangalore's identity crisis between Pensioners' Paradise, Kannada Pride and IT Hotspot will surely lead to name-changes, a lot like Mumbai's been facing over the last twenty years.
But i don't mean to bad mouth the city. It's nice and pretty and the weather's quite awesome. Policemen are nice, rickshaw drivers are chatty and people are generally not bothered with someone holding a video camera in their face. It's just that i feel Mumbai gets jealous when i start liking another city. hehe...
And i simply loved their movie posters! Unfortunately couldn't get the one i wanted to take home, almost ripped it off a wall once. The poster is for a movie called 'Hubballi' which is a small city in the north of Karnataka. Looks nothing like in the movie. Cool poster. Found the hero's restaurant while walking under the signal flyover. He's bought over the neighbouring two buildings also...

Next comes Goa. Wow! Never been there since i was ten, which i realise was not the correct age to go there. Don't need to say more. Spoke in Konkani confidently to lots of locals, especially after a couple of days there. Bought my first authentic festive shirt!!! Notice the 'Reebok' tag on the collar...
Surely won't be wearing it ever again though!

And my native place, the seemingly unpronounceable Bankikodla (try again if you didn't get it right the first time). Went there after 10 years. Didn't recognise most people, but remembered the crossroad near the house perfectly. Odd how one remembers spaces more clearly than people sometimes. Even within the house, i remembered the exact layout of the living room with the one glass pane on the roof while looking at a cousin like i've never seen him before.

And after all that, i realised that the things i miss the most while i'm away are the things i hate the most when i'm here.

And i may have a thesis blog... so check that out when i put up the link.

Shameless advertising.

Xtra Innings...

Today i saw an ad on tv with Mandira Bedi in her 'babe' persona saying 'Watching cricket with me is different..' (imagine attempts at sauciness oozing out of your screen). Very true. Apparently, more women are watching cricket than ever before. Which is strange considering the amount of hue and cry the spagetti top evoked. But the show is evil (to paraphrase Georgie boy) and Navjot Singh Sidhu makes it worse. The pro-India bent is embarassing. Discussing how India will fare in a match 2 weeks from now is bad, discussing the same 20 minutes before Australia play West Indies is worse. Even the numerologists and tarot card readers say 'Today I think I will support India' even before their cards or numbers have spoken (or do what they.. erm.. do). And Rohit Roy who considers himself an expert just cause he's played gulli cricket adds to the gallery of dumbfucks who host the show. The number of experts is always out numbered by the number of hosts. Everything smarter people say is drowned out by Sidhu's long distance call bellowing.
We are generally an intelligent cricket watching public and we deserve better. Otherwise any discussion on cricket is bound to be dominated by 'Did you see Mandira's sari today?'

Memories...

While sorting my cluttered and overloaded computer, i decided to organise my stuff which went the whole gamut from cad drawings to obscure sound clips from 6 years ago. And came across a whole set of pictures from 1st year. Now shamefully i have to say that once you join architecture, you have no life for 5 years. So the people in your class become your family. The same shiny, happy people in 1st year seem so different now. i saw a study trip picture of people working together on some slide or something for kids and it seemed like it happened yesterday. But out of the 4 people in the picture, i can't stand two and the other two aren't as close as we used to be. So what changed since yesterday? Any argument, any issue was sorted out in 30 mins flat. And now we can't even decide a date on which to leave for our last ever study trip.

Does getting older neccessarily mean i am getting wiser? Or just more smug about my own wisdom?

Diwali Day...

Feels nice to wake up without having a schedule at the back of your head. i'm sure my comp feels so much more happier that i'm not opening Autocad anymore. It kinda gave up before i did... 2 days before a submission!! And it's nauseating (by association, i guess) to sit in front of the comp. But i shall fight all that. Its the first day of a (really short) vacation... the first one since 3rd year started!!! Happy diwali to me, i guess...
Saw 'Don'. The Shahrukh version. Have already written about it and have tarnished it even before i could see it. And as usual, its foot-in-mouth time. But before i jump onto the new movie, i should mention i have never seen the original one. So unlike all the reviewers and the oldies who've seen the old one when they were my age and are seeing this one with a nostalgic bent, i can claim that my view of the movie are neutral. Except for the anti-Shahrukh bias.
First, the music. The songs suck. The background score is awesome, going with the pace and the feel of the movie, in fact rescuing some scenes in patches.
Whatever snatches of the old movie ive seen make it look almost cartoonish in its appeal. This one is so slick, i can re-oil my car by just sticking a poster of 'Don' on it's bonnet (sorry for that).
Arjun 'mumble-mumble' Rampal is miserable. Kareena sizzles in just the one song she gets to do. Priyanka Chopra, hot as ever. Isha Koppikar, non-existent. Two performances stand out though. One is Boman Irani as DCP D'Silva. Never imagined the funny man to give such a serious and sedate performance.
And Shahrukh Khan goes back to his 'Darr' days and gives a bone-chilling performance as Don. In fact, when his 'Vijay' avatar came up, it almost made me wish i could fast-forward to the real deal. For the first few minutes, it takes a little getting-used-to to see him in this role. But that's just me and my prejudices. Slowly, you see the effort to make it as different from Vijay or Rahul or whatever. The evil glint in the eye and the childish yet maniacal attitude makes it one of the best character treatments this year. Although Shahrukh hams a few scenes, its still a good performance.
The retro look to some song picturisations and the almost 'flower-power' clothes worn by the males in some scenes try too hard to make a connection the 70s. 'Khaike Paan Banaraswala' gets a new twist with Shahrukh's energy.
The movie has some nice touches. The fleur-de-lis print shirt in 'Khaike..' is obviously well publicised. The other one is not. Shahrukh and his henchman walk into a high security safe where all the drugs and stuff are stashed away. In the corner is a painting barely noticeable yet instantly recognisable as Munch's Scream, stolen a couple of years ago in broad daylight. The painting was found a few weeks ago, around the time the movie was deep into post-production... coincidence??

Speed post II...

Most dramas on the many Hindi channels we get here are family-oriented with a dominating female/male and many secondary characters.

Most comedies on the few English channels we get here are family-oriented with a dominating male/female and many secondary characters.

Thats all.

Question...

What are the chances of someone drinking tea and throwing the paper cup in some bushes such that it falls upright; and leaking water from an A/C on the 1st floor drips right into it??

(i'm really asking... cos i saw one today. And am really interested to know what odds that had...)

Billboard...

My favourite billboard has transformed itself again. (must write a book on it some day) This time into a slick 'Matrix'- green poster of Shahrukh 'Rahul' Khan trying to look uber-cool in Farhan Akhtar's Don. Trailers look slick. Priyanka Chopra looks hot (when doesn't she?). Kareena looks like Princess Leia for some reason. And Shahrukh is Shahrukh. In fact, there's no difference in the outstretched arms as well. 'Mitwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa' becomes 'Main Hoon Donnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn'. Only difference being the black suit. And the glass of champagne. And no violins (thank God for that!!). He doesn't seem to make a good 'Don'. Unfortunately, i'm so prejudiced while watching movies that every time i see Shahrukh, i see 'Rahul' or 'Raj' or 'Dev' or whatever KJo wants him to be tonight. Maybe after 'Baazigar' and 'Darr' he might have been grey enough to be Don, but not now after years of playing the diabetically saccharine characters he's played.

And on a completely different note, 2006 seems to be the year of the broken dream. Old fogeys France gallantly and steadily progress till the finals and lose to (corrupt and evil and moneyminded) Italy in the World Cup. While Schumacher, on the verge of retirement, comes this close to a seventh World Championship and loses to cranky baby Alonso. We need some angels with loads of miracle dust next year.

Orkut part 2...

After months of orkutting, scrapping and other assorted -ings, i have a few questions:
1) Why does the number of communities you join directly proportional to the amount of interest you have in each of them?
2) Why do all communities from 'Keira Knightley fan club' to 'I Hate Pakistan' have the post 'What does the person above you remind you of?' as the most replied to?
3) If someone scraps you while you're online, is it rude to not reply?
4) Similarly, is it rude to suggest you chat on messenger?
5) And when you chat on messenger, why does one realise there's nothing to talk about?
6) Does Google Inc. have a magic wand?

Self-Image...

We are a nation of extremes in all cases. There could be a brand new Porsche and a bullock cart sharing the same lane in a major city. And while a small percentage of our population flies first class, the majority cannot afford to ride in a bus. But we seem to WANT to take the better side of the extreme as representative of India. Fool ourself into thinking that the average is closer to the best than the worst. And that extends to how we interpret events in the world as well.
Take the recent UN bungle about election of a new Secretary-General. We support a New York born, London-based author called Shashi Tharoor, whose parents were in India at some point in their distant personal histories. But imagine him to be, nonetheless, an Indian. As if him getting elected would result in the world recognising that we are after all a superpower. If one simply clears the emotional baggage accompanying a person of Indian origin, i think we would all realise that Shashi Tharoor is as Indian as say Kofi Annan was Ghanian. (which i'm sure many didn't know). And to make matters worse, the fact that Tharoor may not get elected is seen as some kind of national insult in the media. The other day, i see a question on a news channel, 'Does India get taken seriously at the UN?' or something like that. And one of the SMS responses was 'Can you imagine the UN without India?' as if it was but natural to throw one's head back, laugh and say 'NO!!'
Unfortunately, we need to realise that we are as important (or should i say un-important) to the UN or the world as maybe Ghana. The only time the UN talks about us is when one of our peacekeepers dies in Somalia. And when we do get discussed, it somehow becomes an indication that 'we have arrived on the world stage'.
This post is turning into one where it seems i'm indicating the UN to be some important world body. When in fact, it is not. How long can we as a country fool ourselves in institutions that have lost its relevance? Whether its the UN or the Non-Aligned Movement (that massive fraud of neutrality which its founders gave up within a few months of establishing it), our pride on the world stage seems inexplicably linked to how we are seen on this irrelevant platforms. And when something miniscule in proportion does occur, our chests swell up.
The U.S. is the bully of the world. And we made the unfortunate mistake of latching our wagon on another bully, who long ago shifted schools. Now we seem to be like the teacher's pet, feeling very happy when the teacher gives us a gold star. But its recess time and the bully controls the class. And however many gold stars we get, the bully and his cronies will have the last say. So we sit smugly and count our gold stars while the bully and his cronies steal our lunch money.
And marvel saying 'Oh, we've finally arrived!'

Small World...

Did anyone know there's a town called (hold your breath) KRVIA?????

www.traveljournals.net/explore/albania/map/m159489/krvia.html

Reminds me of a joke, totally politically incorrect but that's how i like them...

An eye doctor gets a Czech patient. He tells him to read a chart that has the following letters:
B W R I E T A F S I C Z
He asks the patient, 'Can you figure out what's written?'
The Czech says, 'Sure! I dated his daughter once!'

Headlines...

Today i read the following headlines:

OSAMA MAY BE DEAD, SAYS FRENCH NEWSPAPER

BUSH DENIES OSAMA DEATH REPORTS

U.S. AND PAKISTAN TO INTENSIFY HUNT FOR OSAMA

OIL PRICES DOWN TO $57

Now if there's a conspiracy here, i wish the newspaper would simply spell it out on one page. It takes some time to turn the pages and make the connection, although it's SOOO obvious....

Weekends...

Why doesn't a weekend seem like a weekend any more? My bro in the U.S. lives it up every Friday - Sunday. He seems to be doing the most un-him things, things that he would have never dreamt of doing (or got out of bed long enough to). And actually thinks that i would like to listen to detailed descriptions of his bungee jumpin/white water rafting/hitting head on wall without feeling a tad bit envious.
And here i sit before my comp's new LCD screen wondering if my schedule will get upset if i just sit and read a book for 15 minutes.
And the only source of excitement all day has been the red and green dots that come in front of my eyes when i turn away from the screen. (Wheee!!!They're dancing!!!)
And you can see how bored i am...
And i'm absolutely sure i'm not drunk or high...

Professionalism...

One more gem from the Indian media:

'We don't know whether Musharraf and Manmohan Singh will merely shake hands or hug. Right now there's lots of speculation and heated debate here in Havana regarding that."

This one from CNN-IBN and i swear to God the reporter was serious....

Home Improvement...

After more than a year of complaining, cribbing and being cynical about how my peer group hates anything to do with thinking or growing mentally etc etc (which i'm sure everyone agrees is THE cause of this blog... and its title.. and its web address), i finally decided to take the advice of someone who i don't like too much and decided to do things that i would find interesting, whether or not someone else does and hopefully find other similar minded people.
So task # 1 was to start reading again. Started off with something veryyyyy light to get myself back in the groove. Beach Boy by Ardeshir Vakil. Decent book. A little predictable though and gets a little unrealistic at times but a good start. Next came something i heard about through the 'Environmental Design' elective group. A book called 'Collapse' which says that basically every single civilizational collapse is caused by environmental problems. Read the weirdest excuse for India's caste system: apparently the reason why it was invented is so each caste could protect their own resources to prevent over-use....
Task # 2 is attempting to watch movies... not the KANK types, but the ones Rohan writes about so often. Caught the first 3 obstructions (??!!) of 'The 5 Obstructions' as i was procrastinating about A.D. And also saw 'Roger and Me' with the film theory elective people. And now i know i'm bored and irritated with Michael Moore's i'll-shove-a-camera-in-your-face-whether-you-like-it-or-not type movies.
Task # 3 was shutting myself off from the 'Why do we need to think?' comments that one gets to hear so often in class. And it's not working too much. And the need to reflect that frustration onto this blog was toooooo over bearing. And i tried to immerse myself more into tasks #1 and #2 and also a bit in A.D.

Hence: no post (hehehehhee... long explanation no?)

And ya, before you wonder which elective i'm in... it's called 'Urban Theory' and i haven't seen the guy who's supposed to be doing that elective for 4 weeks. He said he won't come for one Saturday but hasn't turned up for the remaining three too. So can someone check up on him??

Blogger's Block...

What makes it worse is when one has settled into a comfortable routine where one post comes up every few days... and now i sit in front of the screen and wonder: what do i write???
It would be easy to make this a bitch-blog. But i do not aim to use this blog to create a false sense of superiority.
It would be easy to make it a record of mundane events in my daily routine. But i don't have such an interesting life. Do i write what is happening in my sucky, frustrating life? Or do i need to have such detailed documentation of it??
So far, i write when i feel like writing about things that i might have something to say about. So it's a diary...
But it's not a diary either, cos it's out for the whole world to see.
So what is this blog?
i tend to treat it as a make-believe opinion column in a make-believe newspaper with a circulation of 1. So does that make it personal? Or does the fact that 1696 people have read my posts make it public?
And therein lies the identity crisis. And the blogger's block. And this rambling post.

Pigs...

This week was quite bad for the cricketing world. First the bomb blasts in Sri Lanka with the subsequent refusal of the South Africans to play, and today the ball tampering controversy in England and Pakistan's refusal to play. And although both happened far away in completely different contexts, one can't help but think that when someone will write the history of the sport in a few years time, both incidents will be grouped under the chapter 'Racism'.

i'm not one of those who are quick to interpret any controversy as White v/s Coloured. But cricket's track record is too strong to be denied as proof. And invariably, inspite of having a Pakistani chief, the ICC seems to have a different set of rules for the White Gentleman.

Australia played the Ashes quite happily after the London train bombings. And if the Australian or the English team had actually tampered the ball, no umpire in the world would have so openly and brazenly penalised them without any explanation or proof. The South Africans complain about the 'dangerous' situation in SL, and the very same night party in a disco close to where the bombings happened. Everyone knows both Brett Lee and Muralitharan chuck the ball, but only one of them has his credibility questioned. Pakistan has a past history of ball tampering which is always taken as 'proof' against them, but when known sledger Glenn McGrath gets into an argument with a 'coloured' Ramnaresh Sarwan, it's the latter who gets banned for a few matches. Spinning tracks in India are an 'unfair advantage' while bouncy, pacy wickets in Australia are 'challenging playing conditions'. And there's much more which i cannot remember...

i do not particularly like the Pakistani cricket team, but i so respect what they did today. In this time and age, cricket's soul lies in the sub-continent; but in ther minds of the controlling body, it's still a White Man's Game.

Ok fine!!!...

i can't believe i'm saying this, but still...



KANK WAS A DECENT MOVIE



(but now starts the fine print.. muhahahahahahhaahha...:
1) The trappings of a Karan Johar movie distract from what i feel is a good tight script.
2) Shahrukh Khan cannot act. Yet i sympathise with his character's attitude having been through many frustrating phases with similar reactions.
3) It's a little embarassing to watch Amitabh. But benefit of doubt. Maybe it's just my problem.
4) Why the contrived end?
5) Why can't such movies be based in India? Similar issues with Salaam Namaste as well. If you want to be bold, be bolder and set it in Mumbai, not in Manhattan.)

And before i start sounding like a film critic, i will stop.

Freedom...

A day when i can't go to site because i might die in a bomb explosion in a bus.
A day when i can't watch a movie in a theatre because there just might be a human bomb there.
A day when i can't drive on the roads peacefully because the cops will stop me at every checkpoint.
A day when the PM of this country tells us to be aware of terrorist threats.
A day when air traffic is slowed down because of increased security threats.
A day when a simple car accident could start communal riots.
A day of sitting at home and saying 'Saare Jahan Se Accha'.

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

May next year's Independence Day be truly free of fear.

Speed post...

Why does a bad song get stuck in my head for weeks? And why do bad songs get played so often on the radio that i start liking them?

Do people who go abroad to study n say they'll come back ever do?

Why is Iago (or Langda Tyagi) the 'ideal villain'? Is it because he does nothing evil himself, but inspires the evil in others?

Why is orkut so addictive?

Why do we derive pleasure from criticising others just to make ourselves feel less inferior?

Who would you consider a closer friend? Someone who's been your classmate for 10 years or someone you've never seen but just chatted online with for 5 years?

Do businesses actually earn any profits when they offer 'ek pe ek free'?

Why does passion get replaced by anger and frustration so often in life?

Where do i get the answers to these questions?

Touchy...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!
A psychologist who seems modern by her attire complains to the cops that some artist is showing porn under the guise of art! All this in South Mumbai!!!!
And i thought only the VHP and Bajrang Dal had a problem with it...
And i feel sorry for her patients.. especially the ones with sexual issues.....

In a particular 'Seinfeld' episode, Jerry's funny Catholic dentist converts to Judaism. Shocking. But what seems worse to Jerry is that he suddenly starts cracking Jewish jokes. When asked, he says, "I'm a JEW now. I'm allowed to make Jewish jokes. It's our sense of humour that has brought us through 2000 years of hardship... Ok sorry 4000..."

Maybe all artists should join the RSS...

Rain Rain Come Again...

MHADA and the South-West Monsoon Winds bring to you,
For the First Time Ever In Mumbai,

LEARN SWIMMING AT HOME!!!!!
NO NEED FOR SWIMMING POOL, LIFEGUARDS ETC.

All you need is:
1) a MHADA constructed building
2) a room facing the southwest direction (for vaastu compliance)
3) rubber floats and swimming trunks

We take responsibility for making sure you get sufficient depth of water!
All in the comfort of your own home!!!
Hurry! Only 2 months for the monsoon to end!

We do not take responsibilty if you ceiling collapses and injures you. Depth of water may be subject to vagaries of monsoon.

Karan Johar...

My favourite billboard is one that stands right outside my bedroom window. Very useful, especially when the computer misbehaves or the world wide wait gets longer. Today, it shows me a poster for Karan Johar's latest magnum opus, 'Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna'. Studded with the most saleable stars in Bollywood, it attempts (or so i've heard) to recreate 'Closer' but with an 'Indian' heart. 'Closer' portrays the extra-marital affair in the grey, vague territory it lies in. Is it about lust, longing, love or just revenge? And from KANK's trailers, i know it's a totally sappy Karan Johar melodrama about (i quote from the poster) 'A Love... That Broke All Relationships'. Sob Sob. Clap Clap. Good tagline.

i'm expecting a truly bad movie. For one, it has Shahrukh Khan spreading his arms out to violins in the background like he's done in 300 million scenes before this movie. It has Amitabh Bachchan getting credit as if he's the hero of the movie. Karan wants to be in 'Amit uncle's' good books. He gets to say lines like 'Love and death creep up when you least expect it.' And i'm sure there's a loooooong unneccessary role for him complete with dance sequence because 'he's soooo cute even at this age!!!' (puke) And it has the requisite Disco-with-Bhartiya-Dil song. And the slick promos with brown leaves floating all around. And foreign locations with all their sanitised glassiness. And the list goes on. And it won't matter if it's a bad movie. All the critics will shower their praises on him and then call and say 'When will you read my script?', YashRaj films will declare it a hit within a weekend. All theatres, all shows will be KANK KANK KANK...(sounds like a rooster with a stone stuck in his throat) Ugh.
Why can't he stop making movies when all of them look the same??

Oh, they're changing the poster now. Wow! It's Mallika Sherawat and Rahul Bose in a movie together!!!! Now i don't know whether to watch it or leave it...

End of an Era...

Today, my computer monitor is going away. It served me for 6 years, through 3 major computer upgrades. It makes its way for a sleek 15" LCD screen which will take up less space on my already cramped computer table. Alternately increasing and reducing its brightness, it reminded me its time was up.
Now there will be a 'clean spot' the size of a regular monitor on my desk for some time.
RIP

Thought...

Saw a weirdly interesting movie called 'Lake House' the other day. Initial impression based totally on the actors. Expected Keanu Reeves' blank, open-mouthed "I'm the One??" expression and Sandra Bullocks' "I'm the Southern city girl!!!" dialogue delivery. And also the standard Hollywood movie problems, trying to cater to the largest possible audience, screen time for the main actors, unneccessary plot twists, the sappiness of a romantic movie blah blah blah
But that is not why i'm writing this.
The movie was good. Yes. After a phase of 2 years where i saw everything from 'Along Came Polly' to 'Spiderman', i can say FINALLY i saw a decent English movie in a theatre which actually challenges me to think. Parallel universes that collapse and deform and separate and meet, all because of the need to be with someone. The weirdest part was something that someone does in the future changes the past. Now that was so un Hollywoodie. Actually quite a little Hollywoodie. These thought provoking movies seem to come from there quite often. i mean, The Matrix changed the way i think (KRVIA also did, but sorry, the Matrix came first)
So why do we get subjected to crap like 'The Hulk'? Or is it us unfortunate Third World Demographic that gets subjected to trite?

Fatitude...

i used to eat a lot. And was blessed with Jughead metabolism. Throughout school and till last year, i was the scrawniest kid but could compete with the big guys in any eating competition.
Not anymore.
It was the generally nice Amritsar trip that started it all. The Punjabi air, lassi, butter chicken and parathas etc. Then Himachal which was freezing cold and made eating the general pastime. i come back and realise i've gained 4 kilos in 2 weeks. Which seemed ok back then. But since that fateful October, my Jughead-ity has been lost. With a truck tire and a pregnant paunch, i am embarassed to say i've joined the fat brigade...
So i have decided to reduce my food intake. Not diet. Which means, when i feel like eating 3 samosas dripping with oil, i will eat only 2. And my fatness meter is my fellow classmates. The resistance that a finger prod to the stomach brings is the measure of fatness. Less the resistance, more the fat. And i hope i can squeeze a few minutes of jogging in a day.
But its damn surprising to me how much a few extra kilos can change one's self image. Now i'm (trying to) constantly suck my stomach in, sitting in positions that do not reveal my girth.
This seems a good test for my will power. How long will it be before i go for that desired extra slice of pizza? And i'm sure the peanuts i'm munching on are doing something. Maybe the football i played last afternoon will count...
i need to eat. And i should be allowed to eat. Without being prodded.

Censorship...

Seems like George Bush has found new friends.

All in the Indian government. i can't believe they've blocked blogspot.com. From what i hear, its not a mistake.

After 7/11, the government does not increase security at railway stations. It does not ban SIMI, the Shiv Sena and like-minded organisations. It does not bother to do anything serious. But blocking a few websites will make sure that "the terrorist threat is tackled". This is the response to a tragedy that killed 200 people? We all know which country harbours these terrorists. Hell, we even know where their camps are. But trying to ban "bloodspot.com" and ending up banning "blogspot.com" tells me three things:
1) The government does not care who dies, how they die and how many die as long as it does not affect the status quo.
2) They can't spell, read or write properly.
3) They don't have a spine.

C'mon government censors. We are not China. That's what makes our development such a spectacle. We are entitled to our free speech. And if the blocking happened really because of a typo, then i further lose my respect for all of you. Arjun Singh, maybe this should get you to ensure free and fair primary education for all.

The Day After...

Traffic seems ok.
Rail services running just a little late.
Attendance in offices seemingly normal.
Life is back on track.
A day after 200 people die in 7 bomb blasts along the lifeline of the city.
Sometimes, i wonder.
Is it the never say die spirit of the city?
Is it the awareness that death may strike as and when it pleases?
Is it the hopelessness of living in a city that kills you every day little by little?

Don't get me wrong. i love this city.
But sometimes, i wonder about its "spirit".
Maybe the spirit is a certain amount of heartlessness.
Maybe we have all become emotionally dead.
Maybe that's why when a disaster happens, we do such a good job.
Floods, bombs, riots. We've seen them all. And we don't bat an eyelid.
No adverse reactions to seeing mangled bodies popping out of train compartments.
Years of getting pushed around in trains and buses. Coming back to cramped matchboxes called 'home'. Seeing unimaginable misery near every slum pocket.
Leaves no space for 'emotion'. Otherwise we would all be insane by now.

Salaam Mumbai. You have held your nerve. You have been brave. But there's nothing wrong with mourning.

11/7

NEVER SAY DIE.

Tiger Tiger Burning Bright...

The Shiv Sena has never ceased to amaze me for it's intelligence. But today it just left me awestruck. The Thackerays know they have no clout left, not in Mumbai, not in the rest of Maharashtra. So they pick the perfect day to make a "show of strength". Who leaves their homes before 6 p.m. on a Sunday? Perfect time to call a bandh. No one will be on the streets and the Shiv Sena can claim it was successful (whatever that means). In fact, i wonder if even the "desecration" was real. And if it was, i doubt anyone but the Sena has the balls to do it. And as i see traffic on the roads but the news showing images of a burning bus, i can't believe Uddhav Thackeray is claiming a victory as hollow as the Shiv Sena's ideals. The Tiger is dead.

Big City Blues...

After a long day at Bhayander going from house to house asking the same 15 questions while dodging mad rickshaws and unpredictable group members, i have a list! (David Letterman style!!!)

YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN A BIG CITY WHEN...
10) You can't hear the voices in your head thanks to the traffic
9) Your idea of relaxation is Himesh Reshammiya from a rickshaw's torn speakers
8) You're in an empty train you purposely hit the door as you get off, just because you miss the mind boggling rush
7) You talk to people, they're also talking on their cell phones and listening to their music players
6) The closest you came to having a pet was the crow that ate your leftovers every day
5) You have school friends, junior college friends, college friends, building friends, football friends, classes friends, online friends, friends of friends...
4) A black oily liquid is what is left of the sea.
3) When you ring a doorbell, you are assumed to be a salesman unless you show some i.d.
2) The longest conversation of the day were the insults you shouted at the local pervert

And
1) Reading this post makes you say "Hey! That happened to me!" atleast thrice

Mee Mumbaikar...

Wow. Talk about paranoia.

"Andheri is under water!"
- Aaj Tak reporter standing in 3 inches of water

"Is Mumbai sinking?"
-Poll question on CNN-IBN

And frantic calls from friends and relatives living outside Mumbai who assume one of the following:
1) Mumbai constitutes of 2 suburbs
2) All the news channels are honest

"We heard Dadar had neck high water. You live close by right?"
Yes. Dadar is 40 mins away by road. Unless the rain gets stuck at Mahim causeway like all cars do, it's quite close.

"Have you got emergency equipment ready?"
Yes. We have a complicated emergency response system. Step One is not picking up the phone. Especially the outstation phone calls.

Ok sorry. It's nice to know they care. But as i look out of my window and see people wading in waist deep water, the brand new car about to become a malfunctioning submarine and notice that water is in the wrong places (and not in the taps) and reports of people receiving electric shocks in the area...
i can't help but think i'VE BEEN THROUGH WORSE!!!

i guess that's what makes me a true blue Mumbaikar...

Orkut...

Got invited to be member of orkut and realised what the madness was about. "I scrapped you yesterday you didn't see or wot?" i'm sure we've all heard sentences like this and more. And it's damn popular. And user-friendly. And its also really funny to watch Paul with a parrot on his forearm in his display pic. He looks like one of those Hollywood environmentalists...
But let's get down to the facts. Orkut is extremely inefficient. If i have to tell someone something, i have to send a scrap which may or may not be read. And it's not like email which shows 'You've got mail' everytime you get one. And its not as urgent as any Messenger. So it's not mail, it's not messaging, it's not an SMS... wow! i thot if you have these three you don't need anything else to be in contact with someone... but NO! orkut has come to the rescue....
What is it about Orkut that people like so much? Is it the exclusivity? Knowing that you've been "invited" to join "a global community of like-minded individuals"? The number of scraps you get that always feature next to your name? "Oh look what a loser... he/she has just 59012 scraps compared to my 75123." And what about the utopian idea of the World Wide Web; the one that professes no boundaries and no popularity contests?
And there's more.... but i have to reply to someone's scrap about my photo. And also add someone to my list. And laugh again at Paul's display pic.
(is the parrot called Polly?)

Long Time No See...

Went to college after a month and 13 days. Longest ive been away from there since 1st year. Sounds kinda sad and geeky i know. And i missed the large, long and unending studios, the stuffy suffocated AV room, the half-seat half-retaining wall next to the lawn, the stilt area, the waste space where we play football. But not the people. The same ones who i felt like running away from at the end of last year and thought a month and a half at an office where i wouldn't be in contact with any of them would help. Not all of them obviously. But the number's large enough to generalise. i don't know what has tired me about them. Maybe it's the pointless objections to my opinions which my headstrong and stubborn head cannot take. Maybe it is the knowledge of the evil and malicious in each of them, soaked over the last 3 years. For some, the hard core selfishness that seems to rule every aspect of their lives. Or simply, its all in my imagination. Every little incident, every carefree word, every act of indifference. It has all built up and created monsters in my head. Monsters who i will smile at everyday. Monsters who i will live with day and night as we slog over the next day's presentation. Monsters who i don't know are imagined or real. Or maybe its me. i am the Monster.

Weekdays...

It feels damn odd to do nothing on a weekday. Now that i have 4 days off from college. (thank you Paul for the best gift ever.. sob sob... if you didn't notice the sarcasm then you may take it as a genuine thank you) It's too little time to do anything big and too much time to do anything useful. And to add to my general state of laziness, there's no water in the house thanks to MMRDA who break the main water pipe everytime they're in the mood for some road exapansion. Anyways, as ive been making so many lists in the last few days i thought i'll make one more...
...naah maybe not...
lazing around seems fine for now.....
yawn

Gradation...

The feminists of the world (and women living in some suburbs of Mumbai) will kill me for saying this but it seems the number of babes per square metre of pavement reduces as one travels from Bandra to Juhu...

Cup of Woes...

Its Football World Cup Time!! Or for some people, time to show they're 'in with the thang!' So whether they know the difference between a football and a footsie, 'my 2 cents shall be broadcasted'. Not that i'm some big football expert but still....

TOP 5 FOOTBALL WC GAFFES (and why they are wrong):

5) 'I love Brazil. I think they have the best defense.' - Some female celebrity in Bombay Times
(Correct me if i'm wrong but i think they're known more for their attack line. And teams like Italy and England must've felt very bad.)

4) 'Rio Ferdinand has the best striker's instinct I've ever seen' - Nephew who was co-incidentally a defender in school football team
(Yes, he's one of the better defenders in the world and yes he's scored quite a few goals but i think that's stretching it too far.)

3) 'India came damn close to qualifying this year.' - Relative trying to start a conversation
(Strange. God knows where he got that from. Anyways, i don't think we came close..... even by a mile)

2) 'Roy Keane and Robbie Keane will make sure Croatia win the World Cup' - cricket crazy school mate
(Both play for Ireland. And Ireland hasn't even qualified. Croatia ended up 3rd in 1998 and i think this year they aren't very strong contenders.)

BUT this one is the clincher. Even more so cos it happened on live TV and millions heard it.

1) 'England won by a single home run over Portugal thanks to His Royal Highness Daniel Beckingham' - American baseball commentator forced to present 'soccer' show.
(As everyone must've guessed, he's off the show now. And if you're still wondering why, its David Beckham. And he's not even related to the Queen. And its called a goal. And call it football, not soccer. Just like table tennis is table tennis, not ice hockey.)

Enjoy! And may the best team win!

Firsts...

i GOT MY FIRST PAYCHEQUE TODAY!!!
its a different feeling altogether gettin a cheque. its like ur officially a paid member of society or sumthn... ive gotten paid for work done earlier but in cash and trust me it feels so much better this time!!!



sorry bad pic...

Grey...

Today as i drove along the recently-widened road full of vehicles lined with buildings in front of my house, i thought for a second that i was living in some Corbusian dream-city. Except for the dug-up footpaths with pipes sticking out, the dead shrubs on the divider and ugly MHADA buildings replacing his modernist cubes...

Rain Rain Come Again...

i possess the greatest predictor of monsoons known to humans. My respiratory system. Forget the met department, the shedding gulmohar trees, the pied-crested cuckoo etc. A day before the monsoon hits Bombay, i get atleast a cough and cold. Depending on the severity of the first rains, this could be as mild a barely-there case of sniffles. So you can imagine what must have happened this time... i got viral fever which necessitated two days of bed rest. And lo and behold, the monsoon starts 2 days before the met departments predictions.

5 THINGS NOT TO LOOK FORWARD TO THIS MONSOON:
1) Muck
2) Water logging
3) Huge, massive cyclone style 'cloudbursts'
4) Smelly wet socks
5) Stalled cars

5 THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO THIS MONSOON:
1) Holidays due to water logging
2) Pakodas and chai
3) Raincoats and windcheaters in all possible colours
4) Getting soaked in a drizzle
5) Lush green leaves on trees

Happy Monsooning!!

Once Again...

Its been seventeen days since the doctors at AIIMS have been on strike. And still no favourable response from the government. Has democracy been reduced to electoral politics? A game of monopoly. The more number of castes one controls, the more 'secular' or the more 'democratic' one is. Here is a minister hell-bent on fucking up the future of the country and all the prime minister can do is keep quiet and pray the matter boils over and once theres no hope of that happening, issue hollow statements which stink of government apathy. While thousands of students all over the country protest. It doesn't make a difference to most of the protestors whether reservation is increased or not. All of them are halfway down their graduation and if they wished not to care, it wouldn't have affected them. But it hurts when one sees someone (doesn't matter what caste) get the much desired seat in a prestigious college when that person doesn't deserve it. It hurts to see someone drive up in a Honda City and take the Rs. 10 SC/ST reserved quota admission form. It hurts to see someone with a callous attitude and a carefree life get ahead of you just because that person was born to a 'disadvantaged' family.

www.youth4equality.org. Support the revolution.

New old faces...

Travelling back from work in Bandra for the last three weeks has resulted in a recognisable mass of people all of whom wait for that god-forsaken 222 to come on time for atleast once in its warranty period...

1) Girl who always and without fail fiddles with tangled mess of earphones
2) Quiet, nose digging guy who seems to be waiting for someone
3) Cranky old man who always fights with conductor for change
4) Polite guy who always asks in shuddh hindi whether the bus has come
5) Pav aunty with rosary in her hands all the time
6) Bandra chicks who giggle all the time. One of them has 4 piercings in her left ear
7) Girl with laptop who gets off at Gagandeep
8) Loud cell phone user guy with cool Omega watch.

If any of you guys read this and use the same bus stop as i do (im sure by now you would know if you do) then say hi to me on Monday.

Evil Plans...

Saw an article in the paper the other day which said sharing gossip helps in building better bonds of friendship. Hmmm....
A few weeks ago, a few friends and i decided to make use of the little information we have and minute observations we make about other people in the class and put them on cyberspace as a blog. Just for fun and maybe as a reminder of what we were like and what we did in college. Of course no names. And lots of innuendo. And a promise that we won't tell anyone about this and to let people find out on their own. Then somewhere down the line, we all decided not to. Maybe certain people's comments to certain stuff written about them on someone else's blog made us realise people were touchy after all, however much they may try to create an image of the opposite. Maybe we were afraid it might turn out to be malicious. Or even the fact that we're all too lazy too indulge in something like that....
But the question is, how do we decide what gossip is? ive realised that invariably when one talks about another person, it ends up being 'oh i heard that this person...' or 'this person is so (fill with adjective)...' which might get construed as 'gossip'. But most of it is harmless, it makes no difference to anyone in the world and no attitudes or perceptions of people are changed.
So does that mean the minute it changes people's perceptions of someone, it becomes gossip? Or when you make up stuff based on little fact and lots of imagination? i know people who've become the world's worst enemies just cos someone had a bad experience with them and decided to tell everyone within earshot about it. Or the other way round, where someone is hated by everyone just cos that person bitches about everyone. Maybe the news report ain't all that right.
Where does one draw the line?? Could someone temme fast cos i have this juicy bit of...

Fall from grace...

i feel so sorry for one Sean Preston. Poor guy. Must be a pain (literally) having a mom like Britney Spears. First there's the intense media scrutiny. Then theres the pain of having a dad who prefers strippers to him on his lap. And if that wasn't enough, he gets dropped as often as a badly-performing stock. First he fell off his high chair and fractured his skull. Now his mom drops him while trying to save her bottle of Pepsi (or whatever she's paid to endorse). Thanks to her personal bodyguard, he avoided major injury. Wearing platform heels and jeans that would invariably come under those heels may not be bad mothering but it surely points to dumb mothering. One glance at her and 'oops I did it again' doesn't seem misplaced. Maybe globe-trotting, orphan (??)-rescuing, general Hollywood do-gooder and UNICEF ambassador Angelina Jolie has place in her house for another child?

Quota wars...

Before i begin my angry rant, what is the point of designating Azad Maidan as a 'space for demonstration'? For 3 days when doctors were demonstrating in the so called protest area, no one noticed. Now when they got close to politicians' residences and the governor's residence, the police lathi charge them. What is the point of a protest when the protestor cannot make the protestee aware of his/her demands?? (completely off the topic, Rahul Gore and Rajiv Thakkar, also the two university viva jurors, with all due respect, this is why i did what i did for Amritsar A.D. A large open space does not work as a protest space.)

Now comes the fun part. i hate cops. i make no bones about it. They're corrupt. They pick on innocent couples, bikers and any woman who's on the street at night. They fail to do their job well. They do not give a rat's ass about helping anyone else but themselves. Even something as simple as passport verification is bungled up. Elephants in a zoo are in better shape than all the pan chewing, obese, orthodox men in khaki. But today, the Mumbai police crossed all limits.

The images on TV are horrendous. i'm sure by now all of India has seen them. What pisses me off the most is the balls of the Mumbai Police Commisioner. He has the guts to come on TV and say, 'They shouldn't have demonstrated.' SHOULDN'T HAVE DEMONSTRATED?? i can point atleast a hundred similarities between today's video footage and that taken in the 1930s when Gandhi led the country. What freedom have we achieved when a valid point is made repeatedly but one pig headed politician with one eye on the votebank and both his legs dangling precariously over his grave refuses to consider the ramifications of his decision? The reason for the lathi charge is that the students came out of the 'designated demonstration area.' 3 days of demonstration in the designated area invited a small mention on page 5 of the major newspapers. What is the point of the demonstration then? Have politicians become so independent of the citizens that an opinion is accepted merely as token?

And why does Manmohan Singh, the architect of India's economic liberalisation, not speak up? Oh sorry. His voice is the voice of the new Mother India. One who is simply trying hard to ensure her children's future. Nothing should come in the way. Not even the lives of millions of youth.

And why do these things affect me? If you are asking that question, switch on your TV. And tell me if you don't feel a thing...

Standing By...

The other day i was walking along one of Bandra's busy lanes when i see a speeding car (a sedan i.e. ikon, esteem, siena type cars), probably dark blue or black in colour (it was night time, so couldn't see much). As it whizzed by, i heard a loud screech and by the time i looked behind, a man was flying through the air. The impact with the car must have AT LEAST broken his leg. In addition he flipped three times in the air. He must have been thrown a good 10 feet off the ground. i was atleast a hundred feet away but i could hear the thump as he fell. And what does the car driver do? He/she simply drove away as fast as he/she got there. i regret not helping the injured man. i regret not being able to note down the car number. i regret walking away after the initial 2 seconds of shock. This happened on the 5th of May at around 8.00 p.m. near Noodle Bar in Bandra and it took me more than 5 days to write about it which again i regret. i scanned the papers the next day and there was nothing. Maybe if a celebrity was involved, it would have made news. The guy who got hit may be in hospital or at home or may even be dead cos it would be very easy for his head to hit the kerb of the pavement after getting thrown in the air. i know this may be of no use but just once i want the driver of the dark-colored sedan to know that he should atleast feel guilty if he isn't already. Atleast more guilty than i am feeling right now.

Arrival...

Himesh Reshammiya. His reshami nasal voice has left the country in a tizzy. It didn't strike me till a few days ago exactly how popular he was until i noticed a Subhash Ghai movie ad having the words 'Music: Himesh Reshammiya' larger than the title of the movie itself. But yesterday, i was convinced the self-confessed 'rock star' was bigger than anything in the world right now. Here's a list of what was playing around 8.25 pm on the 5 major radio stations in Mumbai:
1) Radiocity: Zara jhoom jhoom (sung by h.r.)
2) Go: A-a-ashiqui mein tere (sung by h.r.)
3) Red: Naam hai tera (sung by h.r.)
4) Mirchi: All day all night (sung by h.r.)
5) Rainbow: Aashiq Banaya Aapne (sung by h.r.)

At one point of time, all these songs were playin at the same time.
i am sure MTV and Channel V must be having some h.r. song playing at 8.25 p.m.

Has he arrived or what!!!

Practise what you preach...

Apparently,
All builders compromise on quality.
All builders do not realise the importance of good lighting.
All builders want is to earn money without putting much effort.
All builders will give you a suffocated, congested space if it means they save one extra rupee.

All architects know ergonomic requirements like the back of their hands.
All architects talk about comfortable work spaces.
All architects talk about light as an inspiration, light as an expression of space.
All architects talk about ventilation as an essential component of the experience of space.
All architects talk about spaces inspiring one to work on even the most mundane tasks.

Then why do most architectural offices resemble sweatshops?

In Anticipation...

This vacation, i promise to do the following:
1) Jog every morning. Running out of breath after running up the stairs has set alarm bells ringing
2) Read two good books atleast. Every vacation the short trip to the book store seems looong. This time its even shorter with Crossword opening practically next door.
3) Watch lesser TV. Eats into time for #1 and #2. Also might be contributing to increase in power of glasses.
4) Play more sports. Haven't played much whole of last year.
5) Contact old friends. Haven't heard from them for most of last year.
6) Clean my desk. Recently, i found a tracing from 1st year. Shocking, considering 2 month old models do not make it to the vivas.
7) Search for better computer upgrades. And install new devices, some waiting for almost 6 months to be installed. And figure out what to do with aging monitor.
8) Fix drafting table. Won't need it much next year, but repair might increase resale value.
9) Sleep 8 hours a day. Actually make that 10 hours, to catch up on lost hours.
10) Enable World Peace. Arrange meetings between all warring parties and give them a 24-hour deadline to fix things done wrong. Another 24 hours to sign 999-year binding contracts with no escape clauses.... (now you know how serious i am about this list)

Looks like it's gonna be #3 and #9 all over again this summer too. Happy Holidays!

RIP Pramod Mahajan

Blasts from the Past...

Finally saw the 'Ek chidiya, anek chidiya' video downloaded atleast a month back. And all the images still as fresh as they were in the good old days when DD was the only channel to watch. The orange-with-yellow border mangoes (which for some inexplicable reason i really craved), the holier-than-thou sister, the blinking sun and moon, the birds pecking at grains hip-hop style... And yet, i don't remember ever liking it so much. In fact, i clearly remember a time when i used to get away from the TV when this film came on. Boredom? Overkill perhaps?

Go 92.5 FM has become full hindi now and that's a big disappointment for lovers of all kinds of music like me. They played a song the other day which seemed strangely familiar and the words came back to me. It was from the movie 'Ek Duje ke Liye' and has lyrics consisting only of Bollywood movie titles. 'Mere Jeevan Saathi... Pyaar kiye jaa... Jawaani Deewani... Khoobsurat Ziddi Padosan Satyam Shivam Sundaram'. And my mom reminds me i HATED this song. Then why does it sound so nice now? Changed sense of humour? Maturity perhaps?

Or maybe simply, nostalgia. The heady feeling of the past being so much better that the haze makes you forget that it really wasn't so good. The lesser you remember, the more lucid the imagination.

Travel...

This city's too long. After a week of JJ visitations for the exams, the 25 or so km between Andheri and CST seem so loong. Useful though. Travelling takes atleast 45 minutes by train and in that much time one could finish the whole Landscape syllabus atleast once. Wait, i'm digressing. The point is that how nice would it have been (considering other factors remaining the same) if the Brits had made Bombay Fort at Bandra. A more centrally located CBD would have solved half the city's traffic and most of the housing issues. Maybe JJ would've been near Sion hospital. Or Bandstand would've been Marine Drive. New Bombay would've been more viable as a satellite city, with a single track connecting this CBD to all those CBDs. Richie-rich Peddar road would've been Khar, Dadar would've been Andheri. The south would've been one large residential area (i'm imagining) with Hafeez-style skyscrapers et al. Townies would be 'burbies and 'burbies would be townies... Oh... and i would've been living in Borivili. And still taken 45 minutes by train to get to Bandra.
Not such a big difference, is it?

P.S. Can someone tell me why, in a city surrounded by water, is Marine Drive the only seaside promenade worth writing home about??

Rang De Basanti... part 3

AAMIR KHAN ROCKS!
Yes. After years of wondering how come this guy gets such respect and admiration in an industry where fickle-mindedness and indiscipline rules, i finally got my answer. The courage to do what he feels is right. Remember the time when Govinda boasted that he shot for 4 movies at a time? And what did Aamir do then? He acted in one movie. At a time when quantity ruled, he put his foot down and said 'I'll take quality'. Okay, there were a few bad moves but he's stuck to his ground. And this willingness to stand by one's beliefs extends outwards too. After the Gujarat riots, he was the ONLY actor to have expressed an opinion. And now, after inspiring millions of people with a movie like Rang De Basanti, he practises what he preaches. 'This shows what politics in India has been reduced to: A few lumpen goons who go about bullying people... I want the people of India to see this and I want them to remember this when election time comes.' This would have got the whistles and applause in any theatre but this guy had the guts to say it in public, fully aware that somewhere down the line his religion will be dragged into the controversy. And today, just as i thought the matter will quieten down slowly, he comes on TV again. And says what he feels is the right thing to do. Without any rhetoric, without any name calling, not even a slightest mention of the political party which dared to burn his effigies.
Rang De Basanti. The sequel. Now showing at a press conference near you.

Posting in sleep...

It's 6 in the evening and i'm sleepy. Not because i work in a BPO. Exam time. Lazed around. Suffered. Had to stay up and study. But that is not the issue. The problem is i might have some sleep related issues. i feel tired and i lie down. And i lie down for hours. HOURS (with extra emphasis on the plural). Actually. And by the time i fall asleep its too late to get up early next morning. So i'm tired again. And the cycle continues... And the body wants rest but my hypothalamus or whatever part of the brain controls sleep doesn't want to. Maybe i should try taking up a hobby. Or write a book while i'm up. Or better still, watch TV all night. Or start working for a BPO. Really.
Oh, btw, this has come after attempting sleep for 3 hours. So forgive me.

Cutie pie blogs...

I'm sure everyone's come across these. Cutesy blogs mostly written by women describing every detail of their love life. 'Today my sweetie gave me a flower' 'Today my darling and I kissed' ' Today my coochie touched my hand'....

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! THIS IS WHAT SECRET DIARIES KEPT UNDER LOCK AND KEY ARE FOR!!

P.S. So many of these are by South-East Asian women. Any guesses why?

Same Old Same Old...

Guess who's back? RESERVATION!!! YAY!! Time to further polarise the country. Time to attempt self-immolation. Time to get more votes (how come this decision comes just before election time??). i know everyone is tired and irritated. No more arguments please, they say. We've been arguing for 17 years but to no use, they say. Well, let me join the side of the anti-reservationists. Some reminders though:
1) Just because i am born upper-caste hindu, does not mean i am upper caste or hindu.
2) Just because i am born upper-caste hindu does not mean i am 'involved in a worldwide historical conspiracy to suppress the Dalit caste (says Dr. Kancha Iliah, one of the foremost Dalit 'crusaders')'
3) Just because there are lot of personal experiences involved, it does not mean i am not thinking clearly or logically. (kind attention: Kaushik Mukhopadhyay and Amita Kanekar, with whom i've got into many arguments about the same issue)

Now some rhetoric:
1) Why do you need caste-based reservation when you want to abolish all traces of it? If i know someone has got in through the backdoor (whether by paying a bribe, paying off the peon or claiming a quota) i will treat that person with the same disgust, whether that person is upper/lower/middle/bottom of the upper lower caste.
2) What makes one think that having a caste-based reservation ensures 'better utilisation of talent' in this country? i have friends who weren't told they belonged to the OBC category and when result time came, their marks were so good, they could've gotten into the open category itself. While some others i know dozed off the whole time knowing they'll get the same course thanks to a 'Non-creamy layer' certificate. (and i'm sure we can all guess which group is doing better).
3) Are we sure that reservation, if needed, is needed at all levels? How much can an individual be pampered? It's a tough world for us unfortunate 'unreserved castes'. If the issue is about providing equal opportunity let's have caste reservations at the 1st standard level. i don't have a problem with that. i can't speak for the rest of India though.
4) Are we reserving for the right people? Shouldn't we have economic reservations than social ones? If the aim is to uplift a downtrodden caste won't an economic reservation work better?
5) Why can't 'Affirmative Action' be the role model rather than forcing some unpalatable decision down some very powerful throats? Works the same way, but works much better though.
6) How does saying 'We've suffered 5000 years of discrimination' justify a lifetime of pampering? Won't that make the VHP's senseless demand for a Ram temple justifiable?

i know, i know, this is a non-issue cos the decision will be taken whether or not everyone agrees. But that's the point of this blog. To say things that i want to say but i know will not make a difference to anyone. This time though, i hope it's different.

Ego Booster...

i downloaded Google bar over a year ago and barely noticed it unless i used its search field. Then a small green line caught my fancy and have been staring at it ever since. It's called 'Page Rank' and basically indicates how important the page is to the world (i know sounds quite grand but well, no better way to put it)...
i got fascinated the minute i realised Google was being all modest and unassuming and rated its start page a 8/10 and giving blogger.com 10/10. But what made me more obsessed with it was when other blogs registered a rating (any rating!) and mine didn't. Rohan's rated a 2, Mukul's a 4 and that wonderful Anglo-Portuguese artist on unkemptwomen.blogspot.com rated a 6!! Now mine shows a big round 0. Zilch. Which basically re-affirms the tagline of this blog. If someone from Google reads this, could you please explain how it works??

Spoilt brats...

Argghhh!! i cannot stand Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie!! How many years does it take for these brainless bimbos to realise their antics are tiresome?? Have avoided/escaped watching 'The Simple Life' for almost 2 years now but have been regularly updated by curious and (surprisingly) interested friends. Saw the trailer of 'The Simple Life' part 3 where they try and work (something they must've never done in their lives) and found the trailer itself sickening. They were interning in an UNDERTAKER'S OFFICE!!! After damaging someone's coffin (with someone in it) and spilling someone's ashes over the floor, they ask an old couple who've come to book graves whether they'll find a girlfriend/boyfriend after their spouse dies...
Paris Hilton is probably the most unnecessarily famous celeb in the world. Atleast Nicole Ritchie seems smarter when not associated with her. Paris must be having an IQ of 10 which puts her on the same level as a mosquito.. just as irritating too. And to think one day she will inherit the Hilton chain of hotels. Why can't she be ignored? Simply cos she's entertaining to all her bored celeb friends. Everyone knows she's gonna keep the interest level in a party whether by making out with her ex-current-ex boyfriend or by banging a stalled car or by pouring a drink over someone's head...
And to their good fortune, the producers of 'The Simple Life' have hit the target. Paris' popularity is because of her USP: being a bimbo. She is the legendary dumb blonde. Her performance (whether real or put-on) as a bimbo re-affirms our belief that our prejudices are true. Blondes are dumb. Here's proof.

Wasteful Inquisitions Part II...

The enquiry into wardrobe malfunctions should be quite entertaining. My only wish is please let me be there!! i can help i promise! This could be my place for internship for the month of May!! (Paul and Sharmishta please take notice).

Since page 3 is deeply involved why can't the inquisitors be Simi Garewal and Karan Johar? Not only would we know the 'real' story behind the incident but get some good sets and snappy clothes. 'So tell me darling, what were your thoughts the second your dress decided to fall off?' or even 'Lets start with you, Carol, for the rapid fire round: Who do you hate the most, Bela Sehgal or the Indian media??' could be question number 1. We could end with a 'Knockers with Karan Gift Hamper' for the one who inspires most sympathy. And let's not forget the pristine white clothes... Or the signing of Koffee mugs... Hell, this event could attract more eyeballs than the Lakme Fashion Week did all week...

Or we could simply let the babus handle the situation. After watching Carol bare her breasts continuously for three months and taking many 'toilet breaks' they will realise that she is not to blame for the wardrobe malfunction. Now we'll switch to the designer. After watching the boob show for 3 months more with more toilet breaks, they'll decide 'Well the designer shouldn't be blamed for this accident.' Next they'll pick on the organisers. Meanwhile their wives will wonder why is my husband so exhausted from work. Well, madam, he is working on a matter of GRAVE NATIONAL IMPORTANCE. More important than onion farmers committing suicide. More important than a 4000 megawatt electricity deficit. More important than a 5% growth rate reducing every year. More important than cops raping minors...

Hell... i don't think i'm laughing anymore...

Wasteful Inquisitions...

Woke up in the morning to what seemed quite an uninteresting day. But the powers-to-be wished my day start with a big laugh. A few column spaces below 'Dirty Cop sentenced to twelve years' there's 'State government plans enquiry into wardrobe malfunction'. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! i don't know what i'm finding funny. It's power crisis time in Maharashtra and i'm already itching to know how many hours of power cuts i'll have to face. But no, the government would rather let us know how the velcro on the dress came off (duh!). Onion farmers committing suicide in Nasik... ummm that'll have to wait. You see, a little bit of nipple seen in a private gathering is of GRAVE NATIONAL IMPORTANCE. The state's laggard development can wait too...

TV...

First Sunday in more than a month i wasn't in college working or at home working. AD jury was bad. Hate myself for not fighting when arguing is something ive become infamous for. Nodded my head like a cow when the jurors ripped my concept apart. Anyways u win some u lose some i guess...

Saw TV without work interruptions. Watched absolute crap all day without hatching/rendering/lettering/pasting models etc etc etc. Three things are big this week apparently: one, Carol Gracias top falling off; two: India winning another one-dayer (which should make us forget 100 all out at Mumbai just a week and half back); three: all kinds of Sufi music inhabiting all music channels.
From Himesh Reshammiya's apparently Sufi inspired dog-yelps to Kailash Kher's intoxicating 'Teri Deewani', its become BIGGGGG. Add to this a number of Paki bands which are basically selling the same Sufi wine in a new bottle. Makes one think: if all those Muslim fanatics find out that Sufi actually started from 12th century Islamic devotional songs, what would they do? In fact, Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan (who must probably be the first guy to popularise this music form) used original Sufi songs and simply changed the addressee. Afreen Afreen with the hot Lisa Ray is actually a song in praise of Allah...
Well, i cannot continue without hot topic number 2. How many times has this happened? We lose 3 million matches in a row and then win 1. Just 1. And then the hype starts flowing again. ive read one journalist who one day calls us 'contenders along with Bangladesh and Zimbabwe for worst team' and then says 'this team is surely the favourite for World Cup 2007'. A mercurial team in a country of dal-badlus.. quite befitting wont u say?
Hot Topic Number 1: Carol Gracias' Wardrobe Malfunction.. poor girl! Now she's in the same category as the DPS girl and Riya Sen. Blame wars going all around. 'The designer shouldve designed better', 'The model shouldve checked the dress', 'It's all because of media hype'... OH GOD! GROW UP!! This 'wardrobe malfunction' was not Janet Jackson's top getting ripped off by Justin Timberlake. This was equivalent to one forgetting to draw up one's zipper after using the bathroom. i haven't seen a single MMS of that!

Star...

i have lived too close (ok, not that close) to Amitabh Bachchan's old house not to know what fanaticism he evokes. Even after he moved a few years ago, there would be people queing up at exactly 6 p.m on Friday. i swear that the traffic actually seemed to be considerably worse every Friday. And apparently, he waved from the terrace of his house (without being there for oh, about 4 years).
Anyways saw another bit of madness a week back, this time near his new house. i was walking along the pavement opposite to his house and this guy is walking in the opposite direction seemingly normally. A second or two before we cross paths he suddenly does a goofy dance (some kinda cross between a drunk ballet dancer and a duck with vertigo) with clicks and whistles and claps. Having been exposed to enough madmen on the roads i ignored and moved away. One cursory glance later i realised he was putting on his performance FACING one of the balconies of Amitabh's house! i so fervently wish he was seen by his intended audience...

The 20 day itch...

Aaaahhhh! It had to be like this!!! When i have time theres nothing interesting to write about. And when i don't the universe conspires to come up with writable topics. The media blitzkrieg over Jessica Lal, new type of diplomacy, the mill lands case finally settled, the Indian team doing so well, if nothing else then atleast the state of road construction opposite my road... so much to write... seems my resolution to keep off the blog till all work's done is a failure. And i will write about one of these things one of these days...

25th February

After weeks of denial i have finally woken up.
March 6 - Working Drawing portfolio submission
March 15 - Services portfolio submission
March 31 - Architectural Design final jury
April 12 - Exams
April 24 - Vivas
So i better get to work now.
No posts for a few weeks...

Group Dynamics...

i had a long discussion in the afternoon about how a group of people with similar objectives affect every individual in the group; either dragging each other down or inspiring each other to new heights. i was just wondering whether this is a very 'Indian' phenomenon. i'm reminded of this very popular anecdote which probably every primary school teacher uses atleast once every year. A crate full of Indian crabs and a crate full of crabs of other nationalities (as if crabs know where they're from) were placed next to each other in a restaurant. The Indian crate was uncovered while the other one was shut tight. A curious diner asked why so. The chef replied, 'If a crab tries to escape by climbing to the top of the crate, usually the other crabs in the crate do not react. However, if the crabs are Indian, they pull the adventurous crab down. So why put a lid?'
Two things come out quite obviously: One, the 'other' crabs seem quite individualistic and independent. Two, Indian crabs are highly dependent on their society. So again i have a few questions. Is it that this anecdote is told in every country, just replacing the 'Indian' with 'Russian' or 'American' or 'Senegalese'? Assuming the anecdote is basically correct, why just Indians? Is it because of a society that places such importance on conforming to the standard? Is it because making it big in this country is next to impossible (although the situation is changing)? Is it because all our epic heroes are called 'Maryada Purshottam' only when they bow down to society? Is it because going against the flow is considered more heinous a crime than doing what is right?
And why is this painted only in the negative light? What if that one crab who tries to escape drags his unwilling colleagues out too? Or is that just impossible to expect here??

More about Cartoons...

i found this damn funny blog. Again, its got cartoons of Muhammad. Don't be alarmed. This shouldn't start a riot. Maybe because this Muhammad is shown as a nice guy. When you make a nice guy Muhammad no one cares whether he's a cartoon or not. Similarly, when you show Jesus had a kid, people protest. Take some of the seriousness out of religion. i think thats when it would make much more sense.

http://muhammadandme.blogspot.com/

Haiku...

To celebrate one of my greatest victories, a haiku:

Not a single mosquito lives
Working in peace is now possible.

17 mosquitoes. All dead. With just 2 weapons. My hands.

Shiv Sena...

They did it again! The Shiv Sena has risen back from its ashes! Doing what it does best! Tell them to stay in power for one year and solve the state's problems peacefully... naaah. Breaking people's legs like furniture (and vice versa), street fighting, molesting women, tearing their clothes... YES!! THAT's our job. They choose to call themselves Shivaji's army. And they believe in bringing in Hindavi Swaraj which was Shivaji's pet concept. Molesting women must have been a part of the manifesto then. In a few days time, Bal Thackeray will put in the papers an article praising his 'brave warriors' who repelled Western customs successfully. Brave warriors who beat up 70 yr old women and little children with whips and hockey sticks. All this for a Valentine's Day celebration which wasn't even meant to be a Valentine's Day celebration. And to make a complete mockery of their own 'anti-western' ideals, they made off with all the foreign liquor at the party.
The Shiv Sena is in shambles. All the roadside ruffians who are members of the party have realised that other parties can provide similar opportunities for breaking limbs and other parts of the human body with official backing. All the Shiv Sena is trying to do is what businesses do all the time: raise their profile. But how long can this continue? Bal Thackeray lost his fangs when Narayan Rane left. He lost his claws when Raj Thackeray left. This tiger's on the endangered list just like his jungle namesake. And let's hope any attempt at Mumbai's Project Tiger is unsuccessful.

Valentine's Day Massacre...

IF i SEE/HEAR/SMELL THE FOLLOWING THINGS AROUND THE SAME TIME NEXT YEAR i WILL PICK THE NEAREST OBJECT THAT CAN DAMAGE AND FLAIL IT AROUND WILDLY UNTIL SOMEONE GETS HURT:

1) Celine Dion's 'My heart will go on'
2) Balloons in heart shape, flowers in heart shape, sand in heart shape, food in heart shape, &%^$* in heart shape...
3) Romantic movies on television peppered with stars revealing their love lives
4) RJ's going crazy all over the radio with the 'spirit of Valentine's'.
5) Couples making out behind the tackboards near the TT table without caring that people can see 'cause its Valentine's Day'... yes i'm talking about people in our college... atleast they could stop the squeals and the giggles...
6) More than 25 couples on any of Mumbai's promenades
7) Compilations of 100 year old songs titled 'I Love You', 'Love You Forever', 'Love You Always', 'Love of My Life'...
8) The Shiv Sena burning cards, shops, people anything even remotely related to Valentine's Day.

Celebrate love. But make sure you celebrate with YOUR loved one. Everyone doesn't need to know you're with somebody...

Clash of Civilizations...

(Before you read this, let me clear some facts about myself. i am a Hindu by birth, Christian by education and anti-religion by sentiment. i hate all organised religions. If anyone reads any thing offensive about their religions in my writings.. u can go to hell or whatever place you find equivalent to it.)

PART 1
Danish cartoons sparked outrage all over the Muslim world last week. Cartoons. By definition,
A drawing depicting a humorous situation, often accompanied by a caption. Thats what it took to burn down a few embassies and kill some people and basically throw the world into turmoil. Osama ain't far behind. He's promised a new bunch of suicide bombings for 'wrongs done on the religion of Islam'. Wrongs done on Muslims by non-Muslims a.k.a kafirs. If you hate kafirs so much and wish them not to exist then why bother. All this crap about protecting your faith is not warranted. Your faith should be strong enough to withstand all attacks whatever is attacked. ive seen Jesus painted in drag. Not a single violent protest. So what is the big deal if someone makes fun of Mohammad. Why can't you simply accept that maybe they do not have any understanding of who Mohammad was and in their ignorance have printed these cartoons. Every single Islamic opinion points out that the West does not respect their sentiments. Where were these so called intellectuals when the Bamiyan Buddhas were destroyed? Not a single peep from the Muslim world about the destruction. Were Buddhist sentiments respected? Why does Islam treat every non-Muslim as second class citizens? And why do all Muslims have to treat anything slightly against their religion as an attack on their religion?? (moderate Muslims too.. just because they don't speak out when they are required too). When will they realise that respect breeds respect, contempt breeds contempt? The day you stop calling people Kafirs (which is such a derogatory term, makes my blood boil on just hearing it and other similar terms whether a Christian or Hindu or Muslim uses it) is the day when the other will stop abusing your religion.

PART 2
Danish cartoons sparked outrage all over the Muslim world last week. Cartoons. By definition, A drawing depicting a humorous situation, often accompanied by a caption. The editors of all magazines which printed these defended their right to free speech. 'The foundation of our democracies', 'Our fundamental right' etc etc etc. When the Iranian government wants them to publish a series of cartoons denying the Holocaust, the same 'freedom of speech' becomes 'protecting sentiments'. Lets face it, the West feels guilty about letting the Nazis run amok and now feel its their job protect them. But when you make fun of a Muslim sentiment you should be willing to insult a Jewish sentiment too. And then why do you say 'Oh these Arabs they hate us so much'? You take their land away and call it Jewish (which is so non-contextual, the Jewish heartland was always Eastern Europe, just like the Catholic one was Western Europe) and then get pissed that they're trying to take it back. And then belittling the Muslim population without 'respecting' their sentiments. Soon Muslim population in France is expected to be large enough to challenge Catholics. What are you gonna do then? Criticise them even more because they're 'taking over your land'. Which is exactly what you have done. Which is what you are trying to do again by taking over Iraq and trying to do the same thing for Iran. Defend your right to free speech by all means. But when you apply it selectively, do not protest when your right to free speech is clamped down.

PART 3
Danish cartoons sparked outrage all over the Muslim world last week. Cartoons. By definition, A drawing depicting a humorous situation, often accompanied by a caption. Muslim attacks on Western embassies, Western protests and mud-slinging. All coming out of a cartoon. Even if i came from another galaxy far far away i would know theres more to this than meets the eye. Maybe there are some things i dont know which both or one of the sides also dont know or know about this issue. But maybe Samuel Huntington's Clash of Civilizations was right. There are no two ways to it: Islam and West (whatever those two stand for: modernity, moral degradation, purity, backwardness) will have to slug it out. Two different ideologies. One big fight. i can already see Don King smacking his lips in glee. In the course of their fight, they might discover that Jesus and Mohammad followed the same prophets. They'll realise that basically their ideologies are the same. But that shouldn't stop the fight. No! How will they protect their faith otherwise? Obviously, there are no bigger issues in the world than two men who lived more than 1500 years ago. They should wield such tremendous power even after theyve been dead for sooooo long.

Let someone make a cartoon outta this!!

Rang De Basanti...part 2...

Saw the movie. Finally. Don't know why so many people complained about it. Yes, the movie has its glitches. Yes, the transformation from happy-go-lucky college students to inspired revolutionaries wasn't convincing. Yes, it was a little cheap to make a real movie about revolutionaries using the making of a real movie about revolutionaries. But it was one fucking inspiring movie. No lecture baazi (Manoj Kumar: every mistake you ever made in your movies is sorted here). No jingoistic Paki-bashing hero (Sunny Deol in god knows how many movies). Just normal people with normal selfish issues. My friend got killed. i think you killed him along with a hundred others. i will kill you too. If that means a hundred other deaths get avenged, much better. i don't aim to be a revolutionary. i may not agree with what ive done. But it has to be done. For the sake of everyone. ive believed that a movie is good if at the end it convinces you that it is true. It has to appear honest. Karan Johar does that, however crappy or senile his movies may be. If he says 'It's all about loving your family' then it means that even if you hate every single bit of the movie, at the end you're convinced that all that crap leads to that one-liner. Rakesh Mehra (dont remember how he spells his name.. two y's and two e's more i think) has achieved it. He convinced me that the movie is honest. He convinced me that all it takes to start a movement is one spark. And best of all, no 'Mere Desh ki Dharti Sona Ugle'. If you take out Fatehpur Sikri (beautiful.. Akbar, boss, you're the best!!) and India Gate, it could be any other country. Salute. To all who were involved in making this movie. In a few days time i will lose my enthu and my appreciation for this movie, but for now this is the greatest movie ever!!!

P.S. Maayur ur project will look beautiful! The last scene with a sarson ka field against the wall of Fatehpur Sikri should be your ideal i guess...

Euphoria...

The Sensex hit 10,000 yesterday. i know all the brokers in India are partying. Headlines in TOI: TENSEX!! Front page. i dont invest in the stock market. Neither do a lot of people who were happy about this. Yet the sense of euphoria was all over the country. "We are in the big league now!!" screamed over-excited TV reporters happy to break a 'big story'. Big league. Don't get me started on how many people die of starvation or how many women die before they are born. The joy on achieving another 'milestone' seems identical to the herd mentality that governs the sensex itself. If the bulls are happy the country (whatever part of it is in the news or sees it atleast) is happy. If the bears are happy, we've descended into economic stagnation. i've never understood the working of the stock market but as i understand it, a lot has to do with 'feeling good'. Doesn't matter if the company's doing well or not. As long as a few big players are convinced about it, that company's stock rises. Optimism must be at a new high now. Remind me to invest my two rupees in Reliance stock, one of the largest gainers over the past few weeks. By the way, just a few pages away was another headline, small enough to escape attention: 'Mukesh-Anil battle begins again.' The glass is half-full... the glass is half-full....

Sunday...

What is it about Sundays that makes me not work even when i know i will be screwed on Tuesday cos i surely wont finish it sitting all day Monday?
Oh btw.. i think i should Rang De Basanti soon... ive come this close to hearing the ending 4 times...